My Strength
by PerfectlyPsychotic
Summary: Raven and Beastboy start to form a strong bond, that soon turns into Raven being his strength. The rest of the team just doesn't seem to understand, but Raven does, and that's all he needs. Developing BBRae. Review, and I'll update.
1. The bond begins

The change between the two was not quick or sudden, it was hardly noticeable if you looked at it day by day. The change was not surprising or alerting, and was beautiful if you looked at how far they'd come. The change was comfortable, and brought on with no resistance, built over time through patience and a desire for it to happen. The change Between Changeling and Raven, growing from co-workers, and barely friends, to an inseparable bond, was the start of a wonderful story.

It began so softly, so sweetly, so quietly, when Beast Boy was alone and wandering the tower with nothing to do. He came across Raven alone on the roof, reading a long novel. It began kindly, and graciously, and genuinely, when Raven sensed his lone demeanor and asked if he's like to join her. He returned with a few graphic novels and comic books. Raven rolled her eyes but smiled at how the selection was just so perfect to him. She fanned out her cloak and moved it to the side, motioning for him to sit beside her, despite all the space the roof had to offer.

Thats where the bond began, but it strengthened when they began to meet every few days to read together. Beast boy remained calm, and when he spoke it was soft, as not to disrupt the half-demon. Raven remained open to slight conversation and even initiated once in awhile. When he was more relaxed like this, he actually had a calming aura to him, one Raven began to welcome more and more.

They engaged more outside of their little book club as well, sitting next to each other on movie nights with the team. When they fought criminals, it was always done with a watchful eye of each other. They'd go to the library once a month together, and on the way home, stop at the comic book store. Raven recommended books she thought he might enjoy and he actually gave them a shot.

The biggest change to the relationship they shared came one quiet mid day. Starfire and Robin were on the roof, and Cyborg was playing Video games in the common room, So Raven and Beastboy agreed to meet for their reading in his room. She ventured to the door, book tightly encased to her arms against her chest. She raised a fist to the door, and the sound on the other side made her stop. The feeling emanating from the room turned her cold. Sniffling and sadness. She burst in the door to a very surprised Changeling, tears still fresh on his face.

He wiped them away and jumped up at her, examining the look of extreme concern on her face. "Are you okay Rae?" He questioned, placing his finger between the pages of his comic and closing the book. She composed herself for a moment, relaxing her face back to emotionless, and crossed her arms over her chest, trying to hide her embarrassment from losing her cool. "I should ask you that, you're crying."

He let out a small chuckle, and held up the Spiderman comic book. "Gwen died." Her eyes went back and forth between the booklet and his face, trying to detect any humor. He lowered the comic and opened to the page his finger was saving. Sensing her confusion he turned the illustration toward her. "I've read this one five times now, and it still always get to me." He admit to her, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck.

"It's just a comic book, how emotional could it be?" She questioned as he eyes gazed over the page, taking in the graphic image of the dead young blonde in the vigilantes arms. He gently took the book from her hands, and flipped a few more pages, explaining as he did so. "I know it's not a novel like you read, but…" He handed it back to her, for her to examine the picture of the superhero crying, and shouting to his villain, that he had killed the girl he loved. "I can feel his pain, you get to know the characters, and start to sympathize with them, especially being heros ourselves."

It was true, just from the view pages she'd seen, she could feel her emotions start to swell. Reading about a character death was always shocking in her books, but now in Beast boys comics the drawings made the image vividly clear and shocking. "What if I ever lost someone like that?" He began again, sadness in his voice. She looked up at him, voice soft and understanding, but still curious and concerned. "Who would you lose?"

He averted his eyes for a moment, trying to gain control of his tear ducts as the thought manifesting in his head seemed all too real and depressing. Finally he looked back up at her, "What if I lost you?"

There was pure astonishment on her face, unaware that to her to he could be so saddened by her death. She hid her emotions again, and tried to think of a sarcastic comeback, but realized, it would not be the proper time. Instead she put a comforting hand on his shoulder, and looked him straight in the eye. "You're not going to lose me, If I ever need you to save my life, I know you will."

The smile on his face made her heart practically melt, and they sat down together, Raven on the bottom bunk of his bed, and Beastboy on the floor right at his side. The rest of the evening was met with completely silence, but a happy one. That is where the bond really started to grow stronger, where their friendship took on a whole new form of need in each other. But like I said, this is just the start, of a wonderful story.

 _Let me know what you guys think, I plan on writing more for this story, a short few chapters like this. I want it to eventually become BBRae, with some involvement for the rest of the characters. Review and let me know if you like it!_


	2. A Beautiful dance

She was beautiful, Beast boy determined as he snuck another gaze at her profile. She stared down into her tea before taking a sip, and noticed his glance. "What's on your mind?" She asked and lowered the tea to the table. He contemplated what he should say to her, trying to figure out an excuse to cover his embarrassing watchfulness. "You're hood is down."

"I never noticed how beautiful you are." He could think of no excuse or lie to tell her, so he was honest. She barely moved, didn't flinch or shy away. He still saw though, her pupils dilate quickly as surprise filled them, and was quickly flushed out. "Thank you." Her voice was cracked, not entirely sure what to say, he seemed so genuine, and the empath detected no indication of lying.

He nodded softly, not sure where to take the conversation from there. It had been months since they began this odd friendship, a few weeks since the Spiderman comic incident in his room. Despite his odd confession of his not wanting to lose her, she did not back out of their readings, or time together. In fact, it was as if they had a new level of confidence in each other. During a fight against some of the Hive members, he recalled when he was tossed to the ground, and she was immediately by his side, healing any soreness he might have and forgetting the battle going on around them. She dropped everything to tend to him.

The silence filled the kitchen and the two locked eyes for a moment, Beast boys inquisitive look changed to a relaxed joy when Raven smiled gently at him. She was smiling a lot more, not just around him, but in general as well. "Are you still going to help me train today?" the green teenager broke the silence. She took the last sip of her tea and nodded her head, motioning them toward the door of the kitchen.

They stood and began heading for the sliding metal. When Beast boy began getting closer to Raven, he knew he wanted to protect her, when she caught his streaming tears over a comic book death he knew he would have to be better. He had been training more regularly, hand to hand, stealth, speed, strength and weights training. He was making slow progress, and it seemed Raven was the only one to notice any progress at all. Because she was watching him, keeping an eye on him as he began to disappear from the common room mid day, and would not been seen again until the setting sun.

Raven was curious about his new interest in training, but didn't ask, he'd come to her if he wanted to talk. On top of that, when Beast boy had come to her after last weeks fight, and asked for help, she was more than happy to accept, after all, the extra training could do her some good too. She relied too heavily on her powers in a fight, and if something should ever happen where she couldn't use them she'd be in trouble.

Cyborg was coming through the door, as the duo were headed out. "Yo Grass stain, feel like getting your ass beat at some Xbox?" He seemed brightly enthusiastic as always, and the younger boy felt bad for turning him away, but he made a promise to himself to train everyday until he was sure he could protect Raven from anything.

"I'll take you on tonight, but Raven and I are going to train right now." And the two were gone through the door with a wave and a smile. Cyborg was left speechless, he wasn't hurt or offended, just confused. Over the last couple months they'd been spending an awful lot of time together, and he wasn't sure what was going on between the two. He shook his head, and let any strange thoughts slip from his mind. He knew them both pretty well, well enough to know that if something romantic was going on, they'd spill. With the thought gone from his mind, he turned his attention to the fridge, in need of a before video game battle snack.

-Beast boy was use to training on the course or with an inanimate punching bag, so having Raven; a real moving creature with magical powers, to test him was new and somewhat difficult. Still there was something about sparring with her that was exhilarating. She wasn't too good at attacks, but she was incredible at blocking, and she was so clever and agile. On the other hand Raven was having a similar exuberating feeling.

She thought he was strong, and brutal, and he'd even gotten faster, but she didn't find him to cunning or smart about battle, and the thought worried her. She lunged with her left hand, which he easily blocked, but it left him wide open to attack his lower half. She grabbed the leg of his uniform with her right hand and yank him upward. This attack sent him tumbling to the ground on his back, his opponent stepped over him, ending with a fist a mere inch away from his face.

Her face softened from the look of angered combat to her usual monotone stare. "You should pay more attention to my body." She stately rather numbly. He blinked at her in confusion, taking the sentence an entirely different way than she had meant. The perverter idea was lost of her, as she went on to explain. "If you watch how someone moves, you can anticipate their next move." She shed her cape, and strut forward in just her leotard, extending a hand to help him off the floor.

They both returned to their normal fighting stance, and concentrated on each other. "If we're pointing out advice, remember Rae, you're attacks don't have to be strong every time, sometimes just a precise blow can take someone down."

She smiled and nodded at his advice, instantly looking over the week points on his body to figure out which would be the easiest to attack. He took her advice as well, watching her eyes as they moved over his body, then watched as her feet shifted into a position easier to move to the left. They both waiting for the other, knowing they were taking each other's advice. Finally they both knew it was now or never, and they both rushed forward, feeling alive and alert and as if they'd been stabbed with adrenaline. The fight that ensued was messy and they got tangled together more than once, but it was incredible, swift but still patient, watching and examining each other. Moving as if they were learning to dance together.

The way she moved toward him, mixing strong blows with delicate attacks. And the way he moved against her, blocking and judging the way her arms twisted and her shoulders melted into the next attack position. And when they switched and he went on the offense, it was like they had started an entirely new game. Where he was slyly moving around her, making her second guess where his attacks would come from, and watching her body as she tried to jump away.

After what seemed like hours, and they were sweating and panting, they called a draw. They smiled and sat together on the training room floor, sipping water and talking about how impressed they each picked up on the little tips they'd shared. Raven walked herself over to the gymnastics half of the room, having an urge to be more graceful and fluid with her movements. Beast boy however marched himself over to the weights, knowing he needed to bulk up, should the strength of an elephant ever fail him.

They watched each other from across the room, occasionally talking and sharing opinions and coaching each other gently on their flaws. It was amazing that the two despite being so far away in the large room, despite still being totally focused on their own thing, despite both of them working on things so entirely different, they were still right there for each other. Despite being so apart, they were still together.


	3. I'll Always be here

Lots of exposition in the beginning, and written while i was exhausted. I skipped a few months forward. As always, let me know what you think.

As time progresses, Beast boy's progress in the gym became exceedingly recognizable to the rest of the team. Months of personal training and training with Raven had sharpened his mind and built up his muscle. He'd become toned, and shapely, the kind of body you see on a male swimsuit model or athlete. His arms had become thick and strong, yet never lost their layer of manly hair. His legs grew to support his new heavy frame, and his thighs filled out his uniform with no resist. Most noticeably different about his new figure was his torso, back and chest sculpted in a way that put the statue of David to shame and curved down to his thin but ripped abs.

All this kept mostly hidden under his uniform unless he was training. Raven had seen his body multiple times; mostly by accidental walk ins in the restroom, but it took her by surprise every time. She just couldn't believe the change that had taken place. Beast boy was once the pipsqueek of the team, the little weakling string bean, green bean, grass stain. Now he was more muscular than Robin, and it was very apparent, making for a very jealous team leader.

It had finally gotten to the point where training with Raven proved to be mostly ineffective, and they were both fully aware. He began training with Cyborg and Robin, sparring and coaching, as well as whichever teammate with him would stand to the side of the training course and toss in obstacles to make it more difficult. Yet Raven was always by his side, cheering him on, and giving him encouragement when the day proved to be wearing him thin. She'd hold his water bottle and towel and watched his training carefully. Her encouragement was not sweet and loving, it was not gushy and full of over confident praise. It was tough and obvious, boring out sentences like 'You know you can do better.' and 'I know that's not your best.'

As always her voice would be bland and void of emotions, and strangely this was the support Beast Boy responded to the best. It was like she was an inner monolog pushing himself to be better with tough love. Training went on nearly every day, resting once, maybe twice a week if he think he really deserved it. The next day he was right back to the sweat, pain and hard work. After every training session, he'd end the day with the weights, while Raven returned to her gymnastics and agility training.

She too had seen change in herself as a result from the training, her once very lightly curved body of a young teen had transformed into the hourglass shape with womanly form. Her thighs and hips thick with muscle, her chest grew with time, and both met in the middle at the flat stomach with the lightest outline of abs. Her arms were slender, yet toned with muscle, mountains and hills of sweet pale flesh. Beast Boy tried not to take notice, being such close friends and all, but they were now both 18 and he couldn't deny that he found her both stunning and sexy.

It had been over a year since they became close, neary 2. Minus a few minor fights along the way, it grew at a steady uninterrupted progress. Training together, reading together, eating and spending time together outside the tower. He even asked her to teach him to meditate, hoping it would calm his mind, and the Beast that wanted to get out every time a fight got too intense. The meditating did little to ease the primitive creature inside him, but it brought him closer to Raven and that was still good enough.

-Raven was up late, avoiding sleep again, as she knew it would bring about nightmares that she'd been having for a few weeks. It was always about the death of her team, watching as they were murdered in front of her, while she watched helplessly bound and forced to kneel with a weapon at her throat to keep her still. The villain was always someone new, Slade, A member of the Brotherhood, Cinderblock, Hell there were even villains they didn't fight, Joker, Mirror Master, even Doomsday. It ended the same every time, Beast Boy badly wounded and near death brought before her, and she'd cry and scream for mercy, begging for him to be spared. Yet her calls were always unanswered, and he was slaughtered before her eyes like the rest.

She sniffled and blinked away tears that had begun forming at the memories. Try as she might, a few rolled down her cheeks, and were lost on the palms of her hand as they were wiped away. "I have to suppress it." She whispered to herself, staring down her damp hand. Should her emotions continue to range like this, her powers would reach out and begin to react. The sudden knock on her door snapped her away from her thoughts.

"Raven?" The voice belong to her green companion. What in the world was he doing awake at 3am? "I don't mean to pry, but i could hear sniffling." Curse his advanced hearing. "And I smelled tears." and certainly curse his advance sense of smell. She made her way to the door, and slid it open gently, stepping aside to let him in.

"What's wrong Rae?" He wasted no time in encasing her in his arms, they were warm and strong, and despite being muscular, they were soft and safe. She reached up and caressed his arm in response. "I've been having nightmares, and they're started to get to me." the empath confessed, fighting back a few more tears. He tightened his grip on her, the old Raven would break the contact instantly, but the Raven now needed the contact, and needed the sympathy. Without a second thought she bit her lip to hold in a hiccup.

Beast boy stroked her hair softly with one hand and rubbed her back and shoulder with the other. "Do you want to tell me about it?" She nodded.

"Everyone is dead, and they forced me to watch, but they saved you for last." The tears were harder to contain now, wanting to tumble down her cheeks and flow freely. The half demon did her best to refute the salty droplets from forcing their way out. "When they bring you out, you're hurt so badly, and I beg and scream and cry for them to spar you…" She took a moment to find her words through a choked back sob. "But they still kill you, and i have to watch as you slowly disappear in front of me."

There was no stopping the tears now, and she fell to her knees, the changeling stayed with he, hushing and comforting her sweetly, he kissed her forehead and told her everything would be okay, that he was here and he wasn't going anywhere. The kisses were soft, and sympathetic more than they were romantic. Placing them in an array of patterns across her head and forehead. She cried in his arms as light bulbs shattered and books flew across the room, as the floors and walls creaked, and the door sparked with electricity.

He didn't flinch or move, instead shielded her from any flying debris that was coming their direction. Despite not being an empath himself he could feel the pain radiating from her like a heater. When she had calmed enough for her emotions to relax she loosened his grip and pulled her back to look her directly in the eye. "I will always be here to fight for you, to keep you safe. I will never let anything like that happen to you, to any of us!" His eyes were narrowed in determination, the hands on her shoulders shaking but still strong and firm.

She believed him, as she felt in her heart that he meant his words. He'd been promising her for a year now, and so far he'd never let her down. She fell back into his arms, and just remained encased in him for a while, calming her heart rate and waiting for her tears to either finish falling for retreat back. The two remained as one for what seemed like eternity, but the most beautiful and relaxing eternity they ever felt.

He slept in her room that night, in the chair by the book shelf overlooking her bed in case he needed to be there if there was another nightmare. He tucked her into bed, blankets and all, and told her again that he'd always be there for her. The room was trashed but they'd worry about that tomorrow. The green teen leaned over her in bed, pulling the blankets up and making her comfortable. He eyed her lip for a moment, and she pretended not to notice. Instead he settled on another kiss on the forehead, and headed to the wicker chair he'd call a bed for the night. "I'll always be here." He muttered in the dark. When Raven drifted off, it was with a smile on her face, and the nightmares forgotten in the backs of her mind.


	4. The Stars

"Do you think it's funny some people still don't believe in aliens?" The two were outside on the roof, Raven was meditating, Beastboy was just staring at the black sky canvas, speckled with tiny glowing lights. The view was obstructed by the lights of the city, and in a way, it was heartbreaking to Beastboy. Of course he loved his technology and his video games and and his radio, but people preferred the lights of the city to the lights of the star.

The Changeling had been meaning to head out a few miles, and see just how beautiful the stars were without the pollution and skyscrapers blocking the view. "I think its funny than any of your jokes." Raven retorted back, and although her tone was the same, voided and flat pitch, he could tell she was joking. He chuckled at her response, and brushed it off. With a quick shift, he laid on his back, pillowing his head with his arms.

"No really, super heros like Starfire, Superman, Martian Manhunter! And people still believe we're alone. It's so weird." he concluded again. "No weirder than people for some reason believing you're green because M'gann gave you a blood transfusion." She laid next to him, flat against the roof with her arms to her sides, letting her fingers run over the rough texture of the roof. He shifted and chuckled again, what kind of ridiculous idea was that? He was green because of his father, he was a hero because of his parents.

They remained silent for a moment, just peering into the mystery of the sheer dark openness above them. With all the adventures they had on earth, imagine the things that were out there, the planets, the species, the memories that could be made. Neither one had ever traveled very far, despite the fact they could leave with almost complete ease.

"We should go out and see them for real." The Green shapeshifter remarked enthusiastically.

"Like just take a spaceship and leave?" Her voice made it sound like what he suggested was the stupidest thing he'd ever heard.

"No, we've got too much to do around here, i just meant out to the open, to see the stars for real." His pupils widened in excitement as he spoke, feeling his blood pump as the thoughts raced through his mind. He sounded like a little kid again, the same kid Raven remembered from years ago, when they were both young new 14 year old superheros. They were aged now, 5 years had passed them both, and their friendship had bloomed and grew to a need in one another.

Beastboy felt his arms getting numb from the weight of his head crushing his limbs into the roof. He moved and laid his head on the roof like Raven was. His arms falling to his sides, and brushing the pale females hand in the process. "I'd like that." She whispered sweetly, and to his surprise, she moved her hand over top of his. Not holding it, just resting it. The contact was warm, and caring, like Raven was feeling the excitement coming from him, and sucking it into herself.

"Okay, we'll go together." With that he latched his pinky in hers, silently promising that the'd soon go together, and share the moments, and make the memories they hoped. For now they were quiet, not moving their hands, little fingers remained intertwined. The both smiled and squeezed the digit, staring up and dreaming of the stars together.

-The next day The two were on their way to the bookstore, and as always Beast boy joined her with an eager smile. They made polite conversation on the way there, and joked about several ridiculous books they would never read. They stood on either sides of a low bookshelf, Gar picking through the crime books waiting to something to catch his eye. Raven picked one up she'd previously read herself and thoroughly enjoyed. Basically an old black and white crime drama in writing as she described it.

Next they walked over to the checkout desk, Raven had pre-ordered a Fairytale style book on Atlantis. The Changeling laughed "Why Don't you just talk to Aqualad if you wanted to learn about Atlantis?"

"It's not a nonfiction book." she replied as she hands the cashier the correct amount of change. "It's a fantasy." She concludes, hugging the book to her chest as Beastboy steps up to the register as well. He nods and the two continue on their way, making it about halfway down the road when the sound of screeching tires pulls their attention.

A navy blue truck had run a stop sign and was now swerving out of control towards the sidewalk. To the left of that was a little yellow sedan, swerving to avoid the truck. Both cars were headed straight for pedestrians. Without a second thought, the two heros dropped their new purchases, and were headed into the chaos. Raven was after the Sedan before her book even hit the ground, the shapeshifter went after the truck.

Raven easily caught the car with her magic and brought it to a halt as to not hurt the driver. When she was sure that was safe she turned to where Beastboy had transformed into a Cheetah, racing toward a child in the pathway. At first her thought was to stop the car, but there was nothing he could change into to stop the car that wouldn't hurt the driver, he needed help.

She raced toward them, the truck was coming awfully close as the kid, paralyzed with fear didn't move. "GAR GET OUT OF THERE!" She screamed as she raced at top speed to get close enough, finally Beastboy gave up waiting for the child and shifted into a gorilla, grabbing the child, and leaping out of the way as the truck zoomed passed. The driver continued to swerve to gain control of the truck, but the slamming of the breaks was making control difficult.

Raven reached out and surrounded the vehicle with her magic forcing it to stop on a small front lawn. As soon as she was sure the truck was safe, she turned her attention to her teammate and the child, who was openly gushing at the Titan. "Wow you're Beastboy, that's so cool!" it was a small boy, 7 maybe 8 years old, happily jumping and prancing as if the near death experience didn't phase him at all.

The empath came up behind Beastboy, her hood up and standing covered beneath her cloak. The boy paused and stared at her for a moment. "She's scary." The little boy remarked, hiding behind the bulky green hero. He looked back, and despite her face and body covered, he could feel her become ashamed and embarrassed. Raven turned away and back over to the books they'd dropped, walking to retrieve them as Beastboy stayed with the child.

"Oh no, she's not scary at all." He stated putting a comforting hand on the boy's shoulder. He looked confused.

"She's my friend, and she just helped to save both our lives. She helps save a lot of lives, and a lot of times, she save my life." Beast boy explained as he watched Raven gather the books in her arms, and stand awkwardly on the other side of the sidewalk. Beastboy Waved her over again with a smile, hesitantly she made her way back over.

"But she doesn't have a face!" The little boy exclaimed in pure terror. To this comment, Beast Boy's eyes opened wide, look of shock in his eyes, and opened mouth. Where in the world had a little boy heard that. When Raven was again by his side, it made sense and he laughed, her hood.

"No she has a face, I promise." He reached up and pulled down Ravens hood, exposing her face to the outside world, she let out a rejected 'Hey' but protested no further. "A very beautiful face, see." Beastboy took the boy's hand and brought him closer. The younglin examined her while she stood still as a stone, unsure what to make of the situation.

Finally the boys face moved from caution to excitement and happiness. "She is pretty!" The little boy shouted, causing Raven to blush, and step back a little. Gar caught her shoulders and held her still. "Thank you for saving me Titans!" And the boy scurried off. He laughed and pulled Raven along down the street to return home, she was dazed and still blushing.

"Very pretty." Gar mentioned once more with a laugh, and smiled the rest of the way home.


	5. Together, even when apart

"So whats going on with you and Raven?" It was Cyborg who finally broke down and asked while him and his green co-Titan were playing video games. Raven had wanted some alone time to meditate, and Beast boy had been respectful of that. It has actually the first time in months Raven had meditated alone, and the first time in over a year Raven asked* to meditate alone.

Beast boy was feeling a little odd about it, wondering if something was wrong, or if he'd upset her. He pushed the thoughts aside for the first video game session with Cy he'd had in 2 weeks, and here the robot was bringing it up anyway. "I don't know, it's the first time in a while i wasn't meditating beside her." He shrugged out the explanation, and cursed his luck when it wasn't dropped like he wanted it to be.

"I mean like in general B. It's been quite a while now, and no one's said anything, but it feels like you and Raven are…" He chose his words carefully, as to not upset Beast boy or Raven should she pop out of the shadows like she often does. "Together." He finished as he set his controller down, placing first in the racing game, as his best friend was still in 5th behind him.

"We're always together, even when we're apart." He said it so casually, so smoothly, as if it was the most obvious answer in the world. Cy raised the eyebrow above his human eye, and pursed his lips in thought. Beast boy finished the race, and queued up another one to start, choosing a new car and a new course.

Cyborg grabbed his controller and set his his preference as well, waiting for the race to begin before he started talking again. "I mean like are you two dating?" He was crossing into dangerous territory, but he had to get to the bottom of this.

"No, we're just friends Cy."

"Do you have feelings for her?" He poked a little more.

Beast boy turned red at the questions, and froze up for a second, accidentally leading his car off course and over the edge of a ramp, flipping the animated vehicle, and exploding on impact. He turned to his cybernetic friend while he waited for respawn. "Are you being serious? Like are you crazy?" He asked with a harsh palm to the shoulder.

Cyborg shrugged, turning his attention back to the game, his response seemed… surprising, but genuine. Maybe he really was just going crazy, maybe nothing romantic was going on between the two…

-Raven let out a moan as Beast boy drew closer to her, pressing her leg up into the air a little more. She groaned and slammed her eyes shut, he was very close to her now, breath on her cheek, hair and lashed tangling into each other, he pressed forward more, and she let out another mewing noise. "A little more Gar." she breathed out, slightly pained.

He looked down at her in surprise but nodded his head and complied. He pushed forward again, moving slowly as he knew this was hurting ever so lightly. "Almost." She panted out, grasping his hand in her, and squeezing out some of the pain into him. He grimaced but held strong, knowing she needed this. She looked so lovely like this, pale skin with a thin sheen layer of sweat, hair damp and wild around her as she lay on her back, lips parted and eyes half lidded. Laying under him, a pure gorgeous mess on the ground with her leg thrown over his shoulder while he moved close to her, raising the leg up higher each time.

"Damn, okay done." She breathed out a sigh of relief as her leg was slowly brought down, feeling her muscles relax. "Thanks for helping me stretch, I never realized how inflexible I was until I reviewed old training footage." She gave her thigh a quick rub from the pain, and sat herself up, taking a short break until she needed to stretch the other one.

She turned to look at him, he'd been oddly silent while they did this, which was weird for him. He looked lost in thought, staring directly at her, but at the same time off in space. She could feel a heaviness in his aura, confusion, and distraught. "You okay Gar?"

His eyes focused on hers and they locked gazes for a moment, he nodded weakly, then paused and shrugged his shoulders instead. "I don't want to talk about it." Beastboy replied sadly. Raven returned to her position on her back, and held out her other leg for him to take.

"Would you like to at least tell me what it's about?" She tried as he took her ankle delicately in his hand, and placed the arch where her leg met her foot on his shoulder. One hand rested on her knee, making sure it stayed straight as he eased her forward, raising the leg higher and straighter into the air as he move.

He'd done this a few times for her before, never minding to help her stretch or anything, it's not like she could turn into a snake like him and slither out of a situation. He moved forward again, sliding so her calf rested on his chest, and he was getting closer to her face again, closer to all of her again. He blushed and pushed that thought away before she could sense or feel it herself.

"Just a talk with Cy, asking about us, what we were. How I felt about you, just general prying." He explained with a glance to the side, not looking her in the eye. She nodded her head in response, and dug her nails into the mat on the floor they were laying on.

"I see, are you sure you don't want to talk? -a little more please." She added in reference to the stretching, he just nodded that he was fine, and pressed down on her a little more, their eyes inches apart, lips feeling the warm breaths emanating from the other. She reached up for him, to caress his face in comfort, but just before she was able to make contact he pushed on her leg a little more, and she felt all her muscles cry out in pain. "Shit." She hissed out, and grabbed the back of his neck in retaliation. She pulled him down close to her, until his forehead lay on hers, and their noses brushed. He smiled down at her, and she returned with a pained grin.

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	6. The Beast, the Raven, the Woods

It was Wednesday night, around a half past ten. Raven levitated beside her teammate Beastboy, who was perched on a branch of an oak tree. For the past week there had been rumors of forest destruction outside Jump City, and possibly criminals using it as a cover. Wednesday nights were Beast boys and Ravens nights for patrol. This was their first watch together, and Raven's first watch altogether. Beast boy and Cyborg had been out on Sunday on first patrol, and saw nothing. Beast boy had tried to tell Robin that there was no reason for criminals to be using the direct path from the forest to the city, but Robin didn't listen.

"It just makes more sense." He ranted from his spot on the tree, pacing carefully back and forth on the branch as he did so. Raven sat cross legged in the air, eyeing him carefully. She'd been around Beast boy plenty over the past 3 years to recognize his emotions, what she was feeling was not a simple anger coming from him. "I mean, why would criminals just walk through the forest straight into jump city." He continued on.

Normally she could feel happiness and love, and excitement radiating off of him like her own personal heater. When he was mad his aura ranged from a dingy pale to a cloudy grey, depending on what he was angry about. What she was sensing was neither of those, instead she could feel this light pulsing, as if his heart beat had become his aura. On top of that swirls of blackness were moving through his aura, and this was something she's very rarely seen in him before.

"It would make more sense for them to travel from far end of the forest near the dessert, and exit near the industrial part of the city, following the path of the destruction." He concluded as he even pointed far off in the distance, where the locations he was talking about were located. He took a deep breath, and his aura seemed to soothe a little, the pulsing slowing, and the swirls dissolving.

"Robin thinks the destruction is just a distraction." Raven pointed out in her usual monotone voice, despite her being concerned for what she was feeling from her teammate. His aura shifted back again to the heart beat and black, his anger reformed from her simple comment.

"No way, I'm willing to bet anything the destruction is caused by whatever they're transporting." His entire theory held a lot of logic, and Raven truly believed he was right, but Robins orders were Robins orders. They'd need to sit down with him and talk it out in order to change his mind. She made a mental note to do that when they got back.

Raven returned to focusing on Beast boy, and the scratching feeling she was getting from him. She knew it would be best to address it, getting him to calm down right now was the best coarse of action. "You're having a hard time with him?" She questioned.

"Yeah, I don't get why he can't just listen to me!" He threw his hands in the air for dramatic effect, and huffed before sinking to a sitting position on the branch, with his legs swung over the side.

"I'm not talking about Robin."

Beast boy quirked an eyebrow at her in question, she flew over to him, and sat beside him, pulling her hood down and revealing her concerned expression. "I can feel this overwhelming reserve coming from you, as if you're trying to keep something in."

He knew what she was talking about, and was completely unaware she knew. His head dropped in shame, and he tried not to look her in the eyes. He'd been trying so hard to keep his Beast at bay, but this argument with Robin, and having patrols in the forest where he knew* his instincts were correct; it was difficult to stay in control.

To be honest, he hadn't had any appearances of the Beast since Cyborg gave him that antidote all those years ago. And he fully believed his Beast would never go after his teammates, especially after being informed of how protective it was of Raven. Beast boy was afraid of letting it come out for a completely different reason, something he'd been struggling with since he'd gotten closer to the demoness sitting next to him.

His Beast form may have come to be because of the dose of chemicals, but the beast was a manifestation of his animalistic instincts. Battle, survival, hunting… mating. He glanced up again at Raven, and suddenly realized how close he was to her. He'd been trying to suppress those emotions, meditating nonstop, thinking random jumbled thoughts so they didn't come up in his mind, anything to keep it from her.

"I'm fine, i'm just getting a little too worked up." He took a deep breath, and jumped up to the next branch, pulling himself up with a pull up, and leaning his back against the tree trunk. The beast didn't want to get out just to fight, it wanted to be with Raven, urged to be close to her, yearned to hold her and do things to her that the teen felt ashamed thinking about his friend.

"I've never felt it like this before, It's very close to surfacing." Raven warned, as she levitated higher, coming up beside him on the branch. "I think you should let him out."

He nearly fell out of the tree, her words surprised, excited and worried him. She didn't understand, he'd been suppressing his emotions of lust just so she couldn't tell, but it was becoming so difficult. Here they were, alone in the forest, no one would be back around until 6am, and she was insisting he let out the very creature that was begging to take here where she stood.

Beastboy inhaled deeply, taking in the scent of the forest, and further repressing the feelings of the beast. The smell of pine, and fresh maple from further off trees, the air was cool, and a small breeze made the hair on his arms perk up with goosebumps. "I don't think you understand." His voice was gruff, the beast nearly breaking the surface. His pupils were dilating, and he felt himself slowly losing control.

"I know the Beast will not hurt me. I feel this is the best coarse of action."

"I'm not worried about him trying to fight you." He felt his muscles growing under the pressure, his uniform beginning to shred. He had to keep this under control, the nightmare of transforming into that animal, and having it pounce Raven. He would never forgive himself. His fangs began to grow, and his muscles ached to be free.

Raven could feel it, hell she could see him struggling, and she knew he either had to let it off, or blow off some steam or he'd absolutely lose control. "Garfield, let him out, I'll help you. I'm here." She insisted again. Her teammate next to her was growling and snarling, trying desperately to stay completely still. Finally, it happened, he turned toward her and look on his face was shocking.

He was caught halfway between his transformation, eyes and fangs of the beast, making horrible noises his eyes narrowed in anger toward her. And he pounced, hand on either one of her shoulders, taking her by surprise and sending them both out of the tree. She did her best to levitate them down slowly, but she was so terrified by his actions she didn't know how to think. The demoness slammed her eyes shut, and listened to his growls, only opening her eyes when she felt her back land on the ground.

The sight when they opened surprised her, the angry fanged teammate glaring down at her. "Don't you understand, it doesn't want to fight, it's not after thieves. It's after YOU!" His voice was deep and scratchy, the fury in his tone matching his eyes. Finally he let it free, the emotion he'd been keeping down, and she felt it wash and wave over her, Crashing down on her soul.

The fear faded from her eyes, and replaced again with her signature deadpan look. God she was still beautiful like that. "Than maybe you, Garfield should take care of it, before the Beast takes over." With that she laid a hand on his shoulder, and pushed her own feelings of calmness onto him. His eyes softened, and his fangs shrank back, he reverted to his human form, and stared down at her. She pulled him down closer to him, and their lips met with little hesitation.


	7. The Words I Almost Said

Sorry its taken me so long to update, I recently decided to go back to school, and I'm also working two jobs, so my only free time is when i get home from work at 10pm and I have to do homework. I'm trying to keep up with this, I wrote this chapter little by little over a period of time, and i think we're finally reaching the big conflict of the story. Lemme know what you think.

"Well! What were you saying Beast Boy? About the destruction being from transportation? Did you see anyone transporting anything near the crater? The one mere meters from your position?!" Robin was yelling, mostly at Beast boy, but Raven was there too. She stood straight and tall, hood up, hidden beneath her cloak. Her male teammate stood beside her, head dropped, but not in shame, in anger. His eyes were narrowed, teeth grinding in his mouth, and fists clenched at his sides, trying so hard not to shout back at their leader.

During their patrol, while they were briefly distracted dealing with the Beast, A large crater erupted before they got very far at all. When Robin heard about the commotion, his immediate reaction was anger, at having no indication about the crime spree occupying the forest, and second, to rub in Beast boy's face that he was wrong. Since there were no signs of people near the crater, it was apparent that it had been blown from a distance, IE a distraction, as Robin suggested.

He yelled a few more minutes, getting right in the green teens face, but never came too close to Raven in such a way, maybe it was fear of her reaction. When he was finally satisfied with his scolding, he ordered them both to the gym for punishment work out. Robin and Cyborg were off to take the next shift, and soon, Starfire would relieve Cyborg, and that meant 14 hours break from Robin that Beast boy desperately needed.

"I'm sorry Gar." She whispered to him, wishing she could blow the anger out of him like a birthday candle. She took his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, reassuring and comforting, but not romantic. He turned to her with a soft smile, clearly faking it. "Don't worry about it Rae." but she did, this was all her fault, Garfield's theory was right, and it was her fault they couldn't prove it.

 _They took a long breath after the kiss, staring into each other's eyes for answers they didn't know how to ask. When he was sure she was truly okay with this he went down again for her neck, kissing gently and nibbling every few seconds, and growing more anxious as she mewed softly in his ears. Her fingers laced through his hair, and gently kept him place at her neck, as she relished in the feeling._

 _Raven brought her leg to a bend at his side, rubbing it into his side encouragingly. From his side he ran his fingers soothingly over her body, she felt the tender touch through her uniform that she suddenly wish wasn't there. The demoness couldn't tell if she felt her own lust, or if his was being pushed onto her, and at this moment she didn't care, all she knew was that his shirt was suddenly very annoying._

 _She grabbed the hem and began to push up on the material, her teammate understood the gesture and pulled away from her neck to remove it. Her eyes widened at what she say, and everything seemed to freeze around them. The trees moved lightly, and the moonlight outlined them like lovely silhouettes with just enough light to show their natural curves._

 _All those years of workouts did wonders, and despite the fact that she'd accidentally seen him naked before, it was nothing compared to now. Those accidents were put to shame now as she was openly free to look, to touch, and explore, so she did. She moved, and turned him, so that she was now on top, straddling his hips, as her hands and fingers traced lines over his muscular._

 _He loved this feeling, her eyes glued to him in such appeal and attraction, it was something he'd never thought he'd feel from her, but it was incredible. As she explored he reach up, and unclipped her cape, peeling it from over her shoulders and letting it become lost in the wind, as they started to lose themselves in each other. She leaned down to kiss him again, their lips parting and dancing softly over the others._

 _There were fireworks in Beast boy's head, and he could feel the Beast receding as he took care of the urges himself. His hands lightly pressed into her neck, massaging the muscles sensually. His fingers trailed over her zipper to her uniform and he slowly pathed it down her body, as if he was teasing her. As he pulled the zipper with one hand, his finger grazed over her freshly exposed skin, caressing her shoulder blades, down her spine, and swirling patterns until he reached the small of her back._

 _When she shrugged the uniform from her shoulders, Beast boy drank in her sight, pale smooth skin, prominent lovely clavicles, sweet curves as her slight cleavage soon turned to the womanly shapes of breasts he seemed to be holding his breath for. He brushed at the freshly bare dip where her neck met her shoulder as she revealed more of her beautiful body to him. He was not at all shocked by the plain black bra with a small amount of dark blue lace trim, it suited her, complimented her pale skin, made her shades and shadows stick out against the contrast._

 _By the time the demoness had gotten the uniform to her hips, they both realized it could go no further while she was straddling the green man below her. He didn't let her move, instead, he flipped them again, towering over her as she laid back on the forest floor, lips slightly parted, eyes wide with lust and something Beastboy was terrified to identify for lack of growing attached and being wrong. At that moment, he needed to pretend that what he was seeing in her eyes was real, that the adoration and possible love shining through her pupils and irises were real._

 _He gripped her hip, slight pressure, but the way she moaned they both knew Raven loved it, his other hand supporting his weight over her on the ground. He breathed over her neck, tickling her skin as he inhaled her scent. He stopped at her ear, "God you smell so good Rae." He whispered so softly, that she barely heard, but she did, and she blushed and reached out for one of his hands. They interlace fingers, and just stared into eachothers eyes for a moment._

 _That's when she felt it, she felt this wave come from him, and something about his face changed drastically. He still had the animalistic hunger for her dripping and spilling over his features, but deeper a layer, she could see it, in his eyes. From his soul she could feel it, and on his lips, she could see he was about to say it. "Raven, I-" *crash*_

 _The earth around them practically collapsed, concaving like a meteor had just hit the ground. He grabbed her protectively, and held her close to his bare chest. His warmth flowed into her, and she in that moment wanted to cry. "I'm so sorry." Despite the agony going on in her mind, she kept calm and monotone when she said it. Her teammate looked at her confused. "My emotions- my powers, they got a little out of control." She motioned to the crater they lay in, insinuating that it was her who had caused it._

 _He could see the hurt in her eyes, the pain, and he knew she was blaming herself. He hugged her to his chest again, giving her soothing hushes that she would say were unnecessary, but they both knew she needed. She hugged him back for a moment, before pulling away and retrieving her cloak, and fixing her leotard, the noise was enough to attract local attention, the rest of their team would be there soon to see what had happened._

Yeah, it was her fault they couldn't prove it, how in the world could they tell the others that? She hated lying to her team, but what else could she do, besides, no one was getting hurt, no criminals actually got away. She would just feel miserable for what she was putting Gar through. If only she knew, Garfield was perfectly fine not telling the others the story, not only for Raven's sake, but for his own. His own selfish reasons, for his own fears, for his own insecurities, for the words he almost said.


	8. Nothings going to change that

Is there anyone still there? I'm trying to come back, i know it's been a while, but i'm almost done with school. I'm sorry

After their workout, Raven went to meditate alone, needing time to think and get her emotions in order. Beast boy watched her go, and his mind filled with anger, not at her, at himself. How could he let the beast get so close to the surface, that Raven would actually propose such a thing. He had gotten so out of control, that his best friend offered herself in such a intimate way. He knew how understanding she was, but now his mind was racing with questions. Was she acting out of fear? Were her actions due to her empathy picking up on the beasts attraction to her, and thus she experienced the same desire. Was she going to avoid him more now? Was she upset with him, now that she had a chance to think about what happened? Does she know what he almost said?

That was his biggest fear, the words that almost came out of his mouth, the words he can not say to her, no matter what.

He tried to push the thoughts away, but his mind was racing, and his heart pounding, the beast was surfacing again, this time through anger. He needed to blow off some steam or this could be bad. Without thinking he picked up the thing nearest him; a 50lb dumbbell, like it was a feather, and heaved it like a baseball at the wall. From within him, the beast roared and his lungs echoed the noise viciously, his hands balled into fists.

The second his primal howl ended, he took off toward the door at top speed, he made way for the stair case, leaping them two by two, three by four, by entire landings, until he was out the back door, and transforming into falcon, taking to the air with impressive speed. Once he'd made it from the island to the mainland he changed from falcon to cheetah, running at top speed across any bit of land his feet would take him, and he didn't know if he'd stop.

Raven had candles lit, and she sat cross legged on the carpet, readying herself for a long meditation session. She opened a large aged and worn book, and handled it in a way that it would turn to dust at the first sign of mistreatment. The air in the room was light, smelled of sage, and sandalwood, and flowed about the open window to avoid stagnancy. The window and candles provided the only light, a soft natural glow, complimented by the flames illuminating her meditation space.

The demoness spread out her cloak around her, and closed her eyes, right as she opened her mouth to chant, she heard it. An animalistic roar that tore through the calmness of her room, causing her candles flames to flicker about the ancient book to flip a few pages, the air swirled, not violently, but sporadically around her, and the scent of her incense was practically out the window. As quickly as the baying came, it was gone, restoring her candles and allowing the incense to begin filling the room again.

A glance to her window spotted a green falcon swoop by and head for land. This had created a bigger mess than she originally thought. It would have to wait though, she had her own internal problems to deal with, and she wasn't about to go track down her teammate in whatever animal form he could have switched to by now. The book pages were adjusted, and her spot on the floor refound. Taking a deep breath, Raven started her mantra, and let herself go.

-When Beastboy returned to the tower, it was well into the early morning hours, but he didn't care. He wanted something to eat and something in the kitchen was dragging him in by the nose, it smelled cheese-y and hot and probably extremely fresh. He walked through the sliding glass doors and a wave of aroma caressed his face and made his entire mouth salivate. He looked over to the counter where Raven stood sipping on tea, a pizza on the counter waves of heat still radiating off the perfectly golden crust. When she saw him, she immediately placed her tea down, and walked over to him, calling his name as she did so.

The look on her face made the changelings heart thump loudly, Raven had this tone of pure peace, yet her eyes had this crossed look of worry and her voice when she spoke his name sounded of a deep relief he'd never heard anyone use for him. He stared at her mouth slightly agape, unsure what to say, she had him struck dumb by just his name. "I was hoping we could talk, I figured you'd be hungry, so I got a pizza, veggie lover's special." the normally monotone goth sounded so unsure, but at the same time had this twinge of hope, like she was a girlfriend trying to comfort her boyfriend after a bad day.

Beast boy nodded and sat at the table, Raven set the pizza beside him and turned back to get to tea. She heard some odd shuffling, and when she turned back half of the pizza was already gone. She stared wide eyes for a moment before deciding, no she did not want to know what animal he was to devour a half a pizza in record time. She sat across from him at the table, trying to make eye contact while he tried to avoid it.

"I want to make sure you're alright- that we're alright." She began, again with the unsure tone in her voice, it was beginning to make him uneasy. Of course since him and Raven had gotten closer he'd seen her portray many emotions, heard all her tones, seen all her looks, witnessed the changes in her speech patterns depending on mood. That didn't mean he was used to seeing her look so uneasy, and when she wasn't sure of something, there was a pretty good chance she wasn't either.

"Well, i'm hoping you're not mad at me, and i've certainly not changed how i feel about you… But-" There was a short pause as he thought of how to collect his words.

"Did you do it, because you were afraid of it getting out? That thing?"

A sip of tea, and her calm demeanor seemed to return. "I know you're not fond of that thing, but remember it did save my life, multiple times. I'm not afraid of it, i worry sometimes, but I do not believe the Beast would, or could ever really hurt me." She concluded, she looked down at her empty teacup, and suddenly craved another cup, Gar immediately sensed it, and took the cup from her, standing and walking over to the teapot on the stove.

"Than why did you do it?" He turned the burner below the teapot back on, and turned to face Raven, leaning back against the counter top.

This she pondered for a moment "I didn't do it out of fear, so you can ease your mind of that. But I also didn't do it for the reason you might want me to have."

He averted his gaze for a moment, conforming her thoughts. "I did it for several reasons, i was worried about you, I know you don't like losing control to it, i was hoping to avoid that. On top of that, his lust and desire was radiating so strongly that I didn't have to be an empath to feel it. However, it did cast the same feelings over me, and they were difficult to… ignore." She concluded to him.

The teapot was already previously warm due to the previous cup Raven had made herself, so it didn't take long for the pot to whistle it's ready sound. "I guess I understand that." Beastboy leveled as he dropped the tea bag into the hot water. Giving it a few minutes to seep, shifting the bag like he'd seen Raven do in the past.

"You understand though, don't you Gar? We've had similar conversations before." The demoness had this urgency to make sure he wasn't hurt or upset with her reasoning. She heard him chuckle lightly as he continued to fiddle with the tea.

"It's okay Rae, I get it." He had this smile on his face, small and comforting, but she didn't miss the hurt in his eyes. Though like previous conversations they've had similar to this, she knew why it was there.

"So we're okay?" She asked as she went to reach for the tea. The green teen blew off some of the steam radiating from the top, and took a small sip, judging that the taste was good enough for her. When he was satisfied he placed the cup in her waiting hands, and she took it without even being bothered by the stolen sip that would have enraged her years ago.

He stepped over as she took her first sip, he lowered to her level, and laid his forehead against hers gently. Their noses brushed gently and she blushed slightly but did not move. It was as if he was allowing the closeness so that she could sense that he wasn't lying to her. "We're okay Raven. Nothing's gonna change that."


	9. The Claw in the night

Honestly this chapter is just a little bit of filler, i know what i want to do next, i'm just having trouble getting it on the page. So this is just a tide over to cast them deeper into this awkward little thing they got going on. Rating may go up soon, I don't know what i've got it at right now. It won't be anything to bad, just more mature content somewhere down the line, I just don't know how crazy people get over the rating.

Warmth hit her face, light followed. Wind breezed through her hair, and she decided now was a good time to open her eyes. Confusion fell upon her as she failed to recall how she came to be standing outside, in the forest. Gar had invited her out, but she can not remember why, or how she'd gotten here. Raven tried to rerun the events of the day in her head. When she woke up, the first thing she did was light an incense. She taken a few minutes to fully wake up before heading to the shower, and dressing for her outing.

She looked down to the deep purple sundress she was wearing, same one she remembered putting on. She remembered meeting Gar by his door, and talking about plans for the day, reminding him to grab his communicator in case they were needed. There was nothing after that, no memory of driving, walking, flying, or phasing. No memory of arriving, or what they planned on doing, or how long they'd already been here.

The smell of fresh pine and maple filled her nose, and the breeze caressed her locks softly. In a moment she felt the soft gentle breeze turn to short but heavy warm spurts, and instead of billowing past her they were aimed. The demoness spun around, coming face to face with a green furry face, that of the Beast.

"Gar?" She whispered in confusion. The beast huffed out another breath, looking over her, walking around and gazing at her from every angle. She felt odd, she felt embarrassed and warm and slightly impatient; as if she was awaiting a score or prognosis. Finally he came up to nuzzle her neck, forcing her head to the side to allow more access. She didn't fight him, in fact, she welcomed the loving gesture, twirling her fingers through his soft green coat. He almost let out a purr.

The mammoth sized green beast nuzzled harder, holding her, as the force of his weight forced her to the ground. He nipped lightly along her neck and she froze, unsure what to do, unsure how to react. This was the Beast, not Garfield, not her teammate, not her best friend, nuzzling and biting gently at her neck… but they were the same being. That being said, would it matter which one was nipping at her neck? This was something she couldn't let happen.

The normally dangerous claws of the beast rested on her stomach, circling the fabric of the sundress, and she tried to focus more on ending the situation rather than the comprehension of how the beast was acting oddly human right now. His circles danced lower, his target was fairly obvious. And when they reached the mark Raven felt the single digit over her more sensitive area like she'd just been caught in a spot light while escaping prison.

In that moment, that single circle, that single feeling, Raven jolted upward, and found herself back in her bed with a loud gasp. She breathed heavily a few times, trying to even out the supply and demand for her lungs and brain. It shook her, when she noticed it, but the feeling was still there, inside her, the warm anxious excitement. Her fingers had a slight tingling, and her hair was standing up on end from her head, down to the stubble on her legs.

There was a knock on the door, three to be exact, pretty centered on the door, but slightly closer to the side it would open from. Beastboy knocked like that. "Rae? I was sleeping in my room, pretty soundly actually, and uh, the bed started to shake?" He sounded unsure of how to describe his situation. "I didn't know if you were in trouble or if you were playing a prank on me." Though he was on the other side of the door, she could tell he was rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, and probably blankly staring at his hand while he spoke.

Raven made her way to the door, and commanded it open, by the look on his face; he'd seen the distraught look on her face. "It's a rough night for me." She concluded deadpan.

"Everything alright? Anyway i can h-" He froze, the smell hit him hard, not in longing waves, not in the rising tides, and not in cascading blankets. The smell of her arousal hit him like a baseball to the forehead, nearly knocking him back. His entire face blushed red, and his offer to help was lost from his mind, and he contemplated either running before his instincts kicked in, or trying to overcome them.

Sensing this, the empath reached a hand forward, thumb grazing the center of his forehead and other fingers lying to his temple. She fed him with feelings of calmness, of serenity, and took some of them in herself. She stepped aside to let him in, and with some hesitance he followed. She returned to her bed, sitting cross legged in the center, while he rested on the edge of the mattress.

They rested in silence a moment, unsure of what to say, seconds turned to 3 minutes, and finally Raven spoke. "It was a dream I had." Her voice was as soothing as always, despite her mind screaming at her and shaking her cerebral cortex. "You were part of it, so i imagine my powers reached for you in the night, and that is why your bed was shaking. I apologize for waking you."

Beastboy mused on how nice it was that Raven didn't beat around the bush, that she didn't lie and say nothing happened, or try to drag out the conversation, because honestly, he was exhausted. "What was the dream about?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"I mean, if i was in it, it's only fair i know." He concluded to her.

"I don't know if you want to know."

"I do." he countered back without missing a beat, the look on his face was absolute seriousness, and the way his head was tilted to the side made Raven believe he was silently begging. She sighed heavily and leaned over to him, placing a hand on either side of his head, she closed her eyes, and poured the dream into him, after seconds he jumped up, presumably at the same spot she had.

"You, uh. You're attracted to- that's what gets you… going?" He paced around the same three steps a few times,

"I believe the dream, was just my mind telling me why on recon i did what i did." She explained, Gar waited for her to continue. "I see the Beast as no threat, i see that he will not harm me, and that is why in the forest i was so okay with- what almost happened."

The green changeling, stopped pacing, and nodded in acceptance, they remained silent, and both gave thought to the next move. "Are you sure it's not just your mind telling you how dashingly attracting you think i am, or at least the thing." He emphasized thing to show that he still had distaste for it. Raven gave an annoyed smile and crossed her arms.

"In the way of form, i'd rather have you than Beast."

"Oh, so you're turned on by me." He leaned over and got in her face, smiling cocky and waggling his eyebrows. "If that's what you're going to take from the conversation, so be it." She refused to let him win, refused to become stammered or nervous.

"Well that's what i'm going to tell myself tonight when i'm back in bed." He winked. He actually winked, and there it was, the red face and frozen response from Raven. He laughed, and scurried out of her room, stopping at the door when she called his name. A more serious look on her face this time.

"Gar, You know i can't… I mean," She trailed off before coming back again in a small disappointed tone, "I'm sorry." But she couldn't meet his gaze, she felt ashamed of herself, for feeling this way when she shouldn't for tell him, and getting his hopes up nothing. She waited for him to say something bold, or make a joke, or do something to inappropriately lightly the mood.

It never came though, instead in a firm voice, "Thank you." and he was out the door, leaving Raven to wonder why in the world he was thanking her.


	10. My Cup of Tea

Two days after the incident of the dream, Robin got a call from Titans East, they were down to superheros due to too much rough housing, and needed help, due to increasing crime. Robin sent Beastboy, there was no discussion, and the harsh way Robin told Beastboy to pack his bags had him wondering if Robin wasn't kinda happy to send him off for a while. They'd been at war in a way, constantly bickering and questioning each other. The final straw came when Starfire herself, trying to ease tension, pointed out, that Beast boy had in fact proven himself capable of leading a team, should he need to. Beast boy tried not to be cocky, but he couldn't help the smirk, as Robin's own girlfriend poked at the boy wonders only insecurity.

He dared not share with the team, but being Robin, being known as Batman's old sidekick, still had him feeling like he was just a- a- sidekick. So when the question of his authority was brought up, he tended to get short fused. After Starfire's intervention of the two, Robin huffed off to the gym trying to work out the obvious anger he dare not direct at Star. Beastboy gave himself some time to calm down, meditating with Raven to cool his own nerves, and her own input about the situation confirmed what he was thinking. Robin might feel a little threatened.

Beastboy found Robin demolishing any and all opponents they had for the obstacle course for training. Robin heard him come up behind him, and he paused, still not moving from his stance, staff pointed at the 'villian'. "I'm not trying to take your position as leader." Bold to lay it out like that. Robin raised an eyebrow, and lied through his teeth. "I'm not worried about you trying to become leader." Beastboy saw right through it.

"Bullshit." He cursed at him. Robin sighed.

"I'm more worried about you leaving when we need you to go lead your own team, and everyone follows you." He picked up one of the heads from the wood cutout, and reflected his own broken feelings. He knew perfectly well that if Beastboy went to go lead his own team, Raven would absolutely follow, and Cyborg honestly might as well. Starfire would stay, but how long would they remain with just the two of them, eventually Star would go off as well, or someone from the Justice league would intervene.

Beastboy chuckled, the idea of him wanting to start his own team was silly, sure he'd become more mature, he'd become stronger, and a better hero, but he was still a playful goofball, who loved his one lazy day more than anything. "I'm not looking to be a leader, i couldn't do it. I couldn't dedicate myself to that."

"Come on, the past few years you've changed. You've trained more, you've picked up slack from a lot of us, you're different, you've already dedicated to that." Robin took a step toward him, an anger in his voice like he wasn't believing Beastboy's reasons. "I've dedicated myself to Raven."

Robin froze at the mention of his teammates name, waiting for the other to explain. None came though, they both just stood in silence making awkward eye contact. The Boy Wonder pondered the words he was hearing, not wanting to make an assumption that would anger Beast boy… or Raven. "Are you two… dating?" he finally asked. The changeling chuckled.

"No, just friends."

"You seem like more than friends." The Leader challenged.

"We have a bond, a very deep one." Garfield explained with a simple smile.

"Like the one Raven and I have?" he asked with a confused raised eyebrow. Again Garfield chuckled, wondering how in the world he was going to explain this. He thought about it for a moment, idly kicking at a nearby piece of wood of the ground from the obstacle course. He looked over at one of the few remaining cutouts, and snagged a birdarang before his leader could react. "No, not at all like the one you and Raven have." He threw the birdarang straight at the cutout, cutting clean through the head with ease, and destroying the cut out like it was no big deal. His aim was impeccable, leaving Robin a bit shocked. "It's entirely our own, and much stronger." With that he left the gym, and Robin behind with a happy smile on his face, and an irritated scowl on Robins. That did not help at all, but Beastboy felt better.

When Beastboy was set to leave for Titans East, everyone gathered outside to say goodbye, he'd travel himself, and would return when Robin approved. So it might be a while. Starfire gave a bone crushing hug, which Gar actually got winded from, Cyborg gave him a manly clap on the back before caving in and hugging him as well. Robin didn't bother getting affectionate, just told him to travel safe, and kept his distance. When it came to Raven, sadness was evident of her face. She took a few steps further away from the others with him.

"How long will you be gone?" She asked in a sullen tone. "I don't know Rae, but we'll call each other every night, yeah?" He compromised with a comforting smile. She wrapped her arms around his neck tightly, and he wrapped his around her lower back. He inhaled her scent one final time, and she welcomed the feeling. The ground around them rumbled a little, and Raven took a deep breath to try to calm her emotions. He pulled back, but only enough to line up their foreheads. Her cheeks blushed lightly, but the ground stopped shaking. She nodded to him like he had said something, but between them was just silence. "I'll call you when I get there." He offered kindly, she nodded again, and they broke apart.

They whispered I'll miss you's and he gave her one final look over to take in and remember her features. After that he took to the skies and was off. Raven turned back pulled up her hood and walked alone toward Titan tower. The group watched her oddly, as they had been with the exchange between the two. Raven wanted to be alone, to meditate, and to sit by the phone, and hopefully hear from Gar in a few hours. Robin had other ideas.

"Raven?" He found her in the common room in Gars usual spot, she had some tea, and the phone was beside her. She looked at him from the corner of her eye, slightly slanted in anger. Of all the people on the team to send, he had to send Gar, and she knew why. He obviously wasn't going to send his girlfriend, and he wasn't going to send her, due to her social inabilities, and god forbid if something in the tower broke he'd need Cyborg around to fix it, so Garfield was the obvious choice. What incredibly ridiculous excuses.

"I thought we could spend some time together, watch a movie, or read and have some quiet. Quiet might not be something you get a lot of with Beast boy around." He faked a laugh into his mild insult for her companion. "Gar actually has a lot of respect for when I need silence. We meditate together often, and he does very well."

"Oh, well, what about some tea, you're glass looks a little empty." He noted with a motion to her mug on the table, the mug was a forest green, with black inscriptions he was unable to read from this distance away. "Still take it with milk and a two sugars?" He suggested, Raven took the final sip from her current tea and held back a scoff in her team leader's direction. "No, I don't take sugar anymore, Gar made it with honey once, and I never went back. He calls it nature's gold."

Robin became nervous about his failures toward her. "I know you're sad about Gar, but he'll be back soon. You've got me in the meantime." Raven stood from the couch, and handed him the mug, silently asking him to wash it for her. She headed for the common room door with the cordless phone in her hand. "Thank you, but it's not the same." And she was gone, leaving a stunned Robin at her reaction. He lifted the mug to read the inscription. "Raven, You're my cup of tea." No doubt it had been a gift from Gar. Which only further annoyed Robin.


	11. Goodnight from across the country

This is a longer one! I figured i took so long, might as well be worth it. In reality i just didn't want to split this chapter in two. I also don't have a spell check, and had to do it all on my own, i hope i didn't miss anything. Let me know what you think!

Also, I know there's a time difference across the country, but being I don't know the exact locations of the two cities, I ignored it, i also ignored it for the sake of the plot to the chapter. Deal with it.

Raven waited, meditating in her room, and leaving only for dinner. Robin ordered out for chinese, and she ate in silence with the others, returning immediately to meditate more. She heard the phone ring and hadn't even noticed the time pass to 2 am. Still she eagerly reached over to answer.

Night 1; She answered with a standard hello, and was relieved to hear it was indeed Beast boy on the other end.

"Hey Rae, I didn't wake you did I? I know it's late, I just got in." He sounded tired, probably from traveling by himself all day. She smiled at the sound of his voice. "No, i've been awake meditating." She replied as she rose from her cross legged position and went to absent mindedly walk the room. She heard him chuckle on the other end of the phone, and she instantly knew he was laughing at her spending the day in her room.

A small silence fell between them for a moment, and she could hear shuffling. "They gave me a nice room, a huge bed, but I kind of miss my bunks." He admit kind of sheepishly, "We've got training at 6am, they said i could skip to catch up on sleep though." He spoke again.

"Do you plan to do that?" Raven asked, softly brushing her fingers over anything she passed in the room as she strode her clockwise rotation.

"I haven't missed training in years Rae, can't start now. I just don't know what i'll do without you cheering me on." They were silent for a moment, comfortable silence as the only sound was soft breath and pacing, she wanted to be there for him on his first day of training with a new team. Would they go easy on him? Would they gang up on him? Could he handle himself, or would he show them up?

"Keep me in mind, while you're with them, I'm not there in person, but I'm always with you Gar." She whispered back, pausing from her walking to press a finger to her forehead in the spot Gar normally lined his up with. She missed him already.

"Are you walking clockwise or counterclockwise?" He changed the subject, knowing that a response to her comfort was unnecessary."

She smiled to herself, how he knew her so well was still so amusing. "Clockwise."

They talked a few minutes more, and he promised to call her the next night, before finally giving in to go to sleep. She curled up in bed, the phone in her hand.

Night 2; He called earlier this night, 9pm, he was probably exhausted.

"Hey Rae!" He didn't even wait for her to say hello, he sounded excited and exhausted all at once, and the sound of his voice filled Raven with a steady joy. "Hey Garfield." She teased lightly, but her voice sounded joyful as well. She stood and began her path, the same as yesterday lighting a candle as she passed the dresser. "Today was total hectic. Training at 6am, which I would like to point out is extremely different from how Robin trains us, there's lots more jogging. We sat down for a team breakfast, which got interrupted 10 minutes in for some wannabe criminal in a grey and purple rubber suit. Freaktito or something like that, after that, an in city fire was consuming an entire block, yours truly was quite the hero in that effort, pulling double duty on search and rescue as well as dumbo the fire extinguishing elephant. Just when i get back thinking i'm going to get some R&R there's team game night. I got my ass kicked at scattergories, but i killed it in charades. They're so connected here Rae, they've really welcomed me."

She listened intently to every word, soaking in everything he was saying, his inflections, and excitement. He sounded like he really like it there, and it was probably nice to get some space from Robin. They talked about how said boy-wonder called it quits on the recon in the forest, but Raven was still keeping an eye on things. Gar told her so long as crime was kept low, him and the team would be out the next day to help clean up and rebuild after the fire. He sounded so excited about that, to be more involved in the city after the crime.

They said goodnight after an hour, and both were quick to bed.

Night 3; It was late again, 12:30 maybe? When Garfield called, Raven had fallen asleep with the phone beside her, and answered in a tired barely awake tone. He too was only partly awake, but he told her a little about his day. She didn't speak much, she was still mostly asleep, and anytime Gar asked her a question it was spoken through yawns and one word responses. She sounded adorable like that, and he smile at the thought of her in bed, eyes closed, the phone beside her on the bed, fighting off the tired just so she could talk to him a little longer. "You're adorable Raven." He remarked playfully, the flirty remarks from his end were nothing new, as he constantly told her she was beautiful or cute, or pretty.

"Thank you, You're-" The rest of her sentence was skewed by a long yawn, and Beast boy chuckled, he should let her get to bed soon. "What was that?" He questioned, expected a sarcastic remark from Raven.

"I said, that you're handsome." He froze, and everything fell silent, she'd never given the compliments in return, she'd normally give him a shy thank you, and change the subject. Honestly Beast boy didn't think she found him attractive, he didn't really think she found anyone attractive. He was at a loss for words on what to say next, his heart was beating fast in his chest, stomach flipping over, and adrenaline pumping. "I wish you were here with me." She spoke again, sounding more tired than ever, and Garfield knew she'd fall asleep soon.

"I'll be home soon Rae." His throat and mouth were dry, at her words. He was met with no response, just a heavy deep breathing, slow and rhythmic. He smiled lightly, and grabbed at his suit over his heart, feeling the rapid rough beats. "Goodnight Raven."

Night 4; Raven didn't remember the conversation from the night before, being half asleep, not at first anyway, but Beastboy did, and he wouldn't forget it anytime soon. He gleefully told her of a sweet little girl who gave him a flower for saving her dog from a car sinking into the river, he told her how tough the training routines were, but he was keeping up with them really well, he was getting great cardio workouts here. Raven had been keeping up with her training too, and she rejoiced with her usual monotone voice that she could now do the splits. The tone made her sound extremely sarcastic, and Garfield laughed as she insisted, still sounding extremely sarcastic she was in fact happy about that. She continued to brag about how flexible she was becoming, able to do the splits and put a foot behind her head, and touch her toes without bending her knees.

Complications arose as Beastboy tried not to picture her in those positions, and unfortunately failed, his mind flashed of Raven in the stances, her face looking at him suggestively ,a devious smirk he'd never actually seen on her, and the words flashed in his brain, "You're so handsome Gar."

He hastily changed the subject, and jumped to his feet, trying to think of anything else in the world. His brain was so pre-occupied that he barely heard her when she announced she was walking counterclockwise instead today. "Changing it up i see. Listen Rae, I'll call you tomorrow, I gotta take care of something important." He was quick to hang up, and Raven felt his unease, wanting to say something, but was unable as he muttered a goodbye, and hung up the phone. He rushed out of his borrowed room, and toward the training room for a much needed stress relieving session with the punching bag.

Night 5; She waiting eagerly to talk to him, to tell him that her agility training finally came in handy in a fight. He sounded exhausted this time, mentally, not really physically.

"You should have seen me! This villain was a total Cat woman rip off, seriously, do bad guys have no sense of originality these days? Anyway, so she was scaling the alleyway fire escapes, Cyborg was too big to get through, and Starfire could maneuver her flying through the clothes lines, so Robin was tailing her, you should have seen the look on his face when I jumped over him and tackled 'Madam Cat' to the ground." Ravens voice wasn't as even as normal, it was full of excitement, she was so proud of herself. Gar chuckled softly, but it was tired.

"Than we fought hand to hand, and I didn't have to use my powers once. And when i did the spilts to dodge a punch and sweeped her legs, I thought Cyborg circuits were going to fry." she let out a soft laugh of her owne laughed to herself, and strode around the room, clockwise.

"Rae that's incredible! I'm so proud of you, all of your progress. He congratulated her with pure elation, but it came out weak and broken.

"Garfield, what's wrong?" Her tone changed, unable to sense his emotions, but she could hear it. Her bragging immediately paused as she began to imagine the worst. Even her pacing came to an abrupt stop, as she realized that she'd been ignoring his upset tone the entire phone call.

"I just had a really rough day, i uh- i lost a guy today. It wasn't a crime or anything, just a guy had a heart attack while I was out at the comic book shop. I didn't really know how to help him, he died before I could even finish yelling for someone to call an ambulance." He was silent for a moment, injecting a chance for Raven to talk.

She contemplated what to say, how to make him feel better, but she knew there was nothing she could say to fix this. "You know it's not your fault though, right Gar?" her voice was soft, and she crawled into bed, not feeling like pacing anymore.

"Yeah, but there was nothing i could do. I'm supposed to be a superhero, but I couldn't help this guy."

They were silent for a moment, both pondering the idea, they may be heroes but they couldn't do everything, couldn't be everything. They were limited to their abilities and powers, and unfortunately resurrection wasn't either of theirs. "I'm sorry I can't be there beside you." She whispered to him, feeling her own emotions start to build, along with the powers inside her.

Beastboy felt his heart thud, and he remembered her tired words from the previous day, did she remember? He tried to speak, but his throat was dry, his mind was blank. He couldn't form a coherent thought, or form a sentence. She opened her mouth to speak, but was interrupted by a knock at the door.

"Hold on Gar, there's someone at the door."

"Actually Rae, i gotta go, I gotta debrief on the incident today. I'll call you tomorrow." He rubbed his neck, and sighed heavily, feeling his entire body pull toward the ground as he tried to stand.

"Oh, okay. Good night Gar, call me if you need anything." She offered to him, he agreed, and bid her a goodnight, and made his way to the control room. Raven made her way to the door, and opened it to a distressed Starfire with tears streaming down her cheeks. Raven stepped aside and let her in.

Night 6; It was around 8am, Raven just finished eating and was heading back to her room. She walked in when the phone was already on the second ring.

"Hello Gar." She answered knowingly and calmly. He greeted her softly, and said he couldn't talk long, they were on stand by for movie night. She smiled at the thought of him getting along so well with the team. She was happy he was being treated well out there. They talked about their day, they're training, breakfast, and what they did the for the day. Raven finished a beautiful book she's started a few days ago, and Beastboy spent some time playing online videogames with Cyborg. She checked on him about the incident from yesterday, and he was feeling better, but not great. He promised to tell her about it when he got back, and Raven had to go for a team meeting. They said goodnight, and were both upset, with how short the call was.

Night 7; Raven waited in the common room on the couch, reading over one of Gar's comic books. It was around 9:30pm and she didn't know how long it would take or what Gar was doing. She was calm through the first 2 comic books, but halfway through the third, at 1 am she began to worry about what he was doing. Was he busting criminals this late at night? No one was really ever out except for small time criminals, and the police normal handled that before calling in any heros. Was he with the team? Maybe a late movie? Did he fall asleep? Should she call him for once? What if he really needed sleep and she'd be waking him.

She busied her mind with the comic, deciding to give him more time, he'd called her later in the night before. The room was quiet and peaceful, void of the rest of the Titans as they retreated to bed much earlier. The demoness felt waves of fatigue fall over her, she yawned and made herself more comfortable on the couch, not even realizing as she began to fall asleep.

At 330am the sliding doors opened, and a figured strolled in. They found Raven on the couch curled up in her cape, and a comicbook pressed to her chest, and a phone in her hand. The figures eyes widened in alert at the scene below them, not expecting to see this as they snuck into the tower. They contemplated the action to take from here, as they towered over Raven in the darkness. The figure leaned down over her, gazing her face, as if gauging her depth of sleep from her complexion.

She seemed in deep enough that the could proceed without interruption, that the intruder could take action without her awakening. But dare they risk it? If she opened her eyes, or her powers reacted themselves, this could be a very messy situation. The figure scanned the room, looking for a backup plan. Finally they decided, looking down at the purple haired woman on the couch, and going down for a strike.

7am the next morning, Cyborg strolled sleepily into the common room, unable to sleep any longer. He froze short of the couch at the sight he saw. On the couch, Raven slept soundly a smile on her face and a thin blanket wrapped around her shoulders, but even more peculiar was that on the couch with her, was her teammate, the one that wasn't even supposed to be here. Beastboy had an arm around her, snoring lightly in the other direction as Raven rested her head on his chest. They looked so natural, so peaceful, so happy. He smiled lightly, at the two that claimed to be just friends, and walked away. He'd ask about it later.


	12. Crying to an Empath

This chapter was a little rushed, I'm sorry, but when I first started this story there was a specific scene i wanted to write that inspired this whole chapter story. Here I am 12 chapters later and I'm still not at the scene yet. Either way, it's coming up soon. In this chapter, we're gonna learn why Starfire was crying, and next chapter we're gonna learn why Robin has been such an Ass lately. Until than, enjoy some slightly rushed filler breakfast, and a flashback. Thank you!

The next morning breakfast was especially cheerful, not so much energetic, but a calm excitement. Raven wore a soft smile all morning, and Beastboy a toothy grin, his fang resting over his lip as it did sometimes. Cyborg shifted his gaze between the two, still unsure of what to make of the scene he found this morning. Robin did the same shifting, but without the knowledge Cy had. Starfire had her usual smile, happy Friend-Beastboy was back so soon, she seemed particularly close to Robin, closer than normal, and he barely seemed to notice.

There was soft spoken conversation, and a few laughs, mostly from Cyborg and Beastboy. Raven had assisted with breakfast, and they practically laid out a feast. While Beastboy went to unpack, Cyborg had started eggs and pancakes, Raven did bacon, and even made facon for her green teammate. She hummed quietly to herself, but Cyborg could hear the pleasant tune all through the morning. When the team sat down, Robin and Starfire were the only two surprised to see Beastboy, but they warmly welcomed him back.

He told short stories of his week with Titans East, differences in the training, how things were run, all the team bonding time. He confessed he like his time, but missed home. This earned a group 'aww' and he rolled his eyes with a smile. From there the team updated him on crime that happened while he was away, local news, and what everyone did while he was away. There was nothing too entirely crazy, though they did go over some of the details of the fight they had with Madam Cat, and it seems as though Ravens telling of the story was extremely undersold when she informed Beastboy. According to the team, it was like nothing they've ever seen from her before, this certain fire in her eyes as she showed off her new fighting skills.

When breakfast was finished, Robin and Star cleared dished for everyone, as the remaining teammates continued to chat happily about Beastboy's terribly unfunny jokes, while said culprit continued to defend himself.

"So what do you say we all watch a movie together, as a welcome back to Beastboy?" The request came from Robin, which actually surprised the changeling very much, when he had left, he and the team leader were not on best terms, now it was as if it was all forgotten.

"Actually, Cyborg is taking Beastboy and I to a car show." Raven replied slightly sheepishly, feeling bad to turn down Robin's request. "You're more than welcome to join us, don't need an invitation to enjoy the prime beauty of finely crafted muscle cars." The robotic man practically sang out the words, praising every car that would be at the show with a single sentence.

Robin wiped his hands on a kitchen rag and tossed it over his shoulder casually, he looked at the three in front of him, debating whether or not that was something that sounded fun to him. It did not, he was actually slightly surprised Raven or Beastboy would want to go. "Ehh, I think I'll pass on that one, Star and I can have a movie day ourselves. It'll be nice to have the place to ourselves."

Starfires eyes lit up brighter than a thousand suns at her boyfriend's proposal, and she was next to him instantly with her arms open for a crushing hug. He braced himself, but still felt his spine crack under her strength. "Our how joyous, it'll be like a night of date!" Her cheeks were rose-y with pure elation, her lips spreading over her gorgeous smile as she lifted the two a few feet of the ground in flight. Robin smiled as he watched her happiness, and for the first time in weeks, the group felt like everything was right.

Raven and Beastboy walked to her room, they'd be meeting Cyborg in the garage in 15 minutes. She just wanted to grab a book list for the bookstore they'd be going to after the car show. The silence was sweet, but the overwhelming urge for Beastboy to ask the fairly obvious question pounded in the air. He bit his lip and pondered how to phrase what he wanted to say, without being insulting to his teammates, or coming out in a way he didn't mean.

"Things seemed different today, happier than it was before i left. Did i miss something?" That seemed right, that came out like he wanted it too. Raven in turn eyed him from her peripheral vision, not turning her head as she now decided whether or not it was her place to talk about what had happened while he was away. It wasn't that he didn't deserve to be informed, but the fact was, it was not Raven's business to be telling.

She debated in her head if it was necessary to tell, and finally determined, that it did kind of involve him, and would finally give the Changeling the reason why Robin had been so cold to him lately. "The other day after I got off the phone with you, there was a knock on my door… It was Starfire, and she was crying…"

-Raven stared wide eyed at her female teammate, who had tears cascading down her face and her lower lip trembling. Raven wordlessly invited her in, and Star immediately sat on the edge of the bed. She joined the other on the bed, and they sat in quite a few seconds while Starfire cleared a few of the tears.

"I don't think Robin is loving of me anymore."

The soft silence suddenly turned tense and uncomfortable. She wiped at a few more tears with the back of her hand. "What makes you think that?" Raven questioned, the confusion evident in her tone. The idea was odd, Robin spent years trying to impress and woo the alien princess, and the last few years they had been nothing but bliss full for the two. The idea that it so suddenly changed with no warning was preposterous.

But… The more she thought about it, the more she realized things had changed lately, she just hadn't noticed because she's been so busy with Gar. Robin didn't seem like himself lately, he'd been spending less time with Star, and more time in the control room, tracking down invisible villains. He'd snapped a lot more, at everyone, including Star.

"I think Robin is loving you." She choked out in an even louder sob. Raven froze, her heart stopped and she felt cold. Not because she thought this at all was a possibility, but she felt so guilty that Starfire was sobbing thinking her boyfriend was in love with her.

"Robin is absolutely not in love with me." Raven put a hand on Star's shoulder, softly patting, then rubbing circles.

"How can you be so sure?"

"Starfire… I'm an empath, and i can guarantee with certainty that Robin does not feel love for me, and he still feels love for you."

The Tamaranean pondered this for a moment, wanting desperately to believe the demoness, but something still bugged her about everything going on with Robin. "Why does he appear to be angry at friend-beastboy? Is it not because of his jealousy for you two?

At this comment Raven turned bright red, and a few candles flared up for a moment. "Beastboy and I don't have that kind of relationship. We are just friends." They were silent for a moment, Star wanted to ask a million questions, but knew now was not the time. "Look Star… I don't know what it is, but Robin is going through something at the moment, he hasn't been himself lately. I think it's best if you were there for him, whatever he's going through, he needs you. I also think you should tell him you've been feeling neglected. I don't think he knows he's doing it, but i know it's the last thing he wants to do to you."

"I believe you are correct, for not being in a relationship, you give the most wonderful advice of the couple's." The princess dried a final tear and stood from the bed. Raven stood beside her, and they shared a soothing hug. With a deep breath Starfire made her way to the door, and went off to find Robin. Raven would have to check back later with Star to find out why Robin had been so odd lately.


	13. The Beast and the Bird

So, to everyone upset with the Robin hate, and all, please understand, I don't hate Robin, I liked Robin, he was a great character, and his voice actor was fantastic. But i do have a plot, this is not just a book of fluff, there has to be conflict, and plot stories, and climax, and all that fun Jazz. Hopefully this chapter starts to explain a lot of why Robin was who he was, and how it tied in with all the BBRae, I'll continue to develop more of Robin's character later, but after this chapter, i do have an actually timeline i'm following with Beastboy and Raven, and we're finally, almost about to the chapter i dreamed of when starting this story. Though it won't have quite the surprise twist as originally planned, now that I've added so much stuff to it. Anyway enjoy, and let me know what you think.

Robin stalked the length of the halls of the tower with a vital purpose, he was looking for someone. Star and him had just had a long talk, and when he says long, he meant excruciatingly long, filled with questions he didn't realize he didn't have answers to, accusation he didn't know she was thinking, doubts he didn't know she was having. So now he needed to put things into perspective, he needed to talk to someone specific, and he was set on a mission to find them. Not in their room, or the gym, or common room. Finally venturing to the roof, there he found both of them.

Beastboy was leaning against a rail, his eyes closed in delight with a wide cheek to cheek grin and a sense of self pride. Below him Raven sat on the stairs, looking up at him with this smile he'd never seen before, like she had just gotten done laughing, and was now just soaking in the feeling. Robin could tell by the look on her face it wasn't one of his cheesy knock knock jokes, or bad puns, but possibly an intelligent well thought out joke, or story. They truly looked so amazing together, even if they claimed they weren't together. He took a deep breath and stepped forward, revealing himself to the two. Though nervous, he knew he had to do this, if anyone could help him fix his problem with his life, with Star, with the team, it would be him.

"Can i -uh, talk to you Beastboy?" He finally managed out, jamming a thumb back toward the staircase. Beast boy's smile changed, to a smirk, nothing cocky or anything, but just like he knew this was coming.

"Of course boss." He reached for Raven, and she reached back, grasping each other by the forearm to pull her to her feet. Once standing their touch lingered and their fingers grazed down each others skin gently as he walked away. Robin raised an eyebrow, but didn't see the point in asking the same questions he'd get the same response to. Beastboy followed diligently behind his leader, but they walked back in silence to Robin's command room.

The air was tense, thick and foggy, and filled with a weird unease. Robin sat at the desk, and Beastboy leaned against the back wall, arms crossed comfortably and waited. Not sure if he should say something first, or if Robin had something in mind. He knew this talk was coming, the obligatory, "I'm sorry about everything, but i'm your leader and i need your respect" conversation he'd been expecting since the incident with the forest.

Robin had his elbows on the table, fingers laced together, and creating a table to rest his chin while he pondered his first sentence. Beastboy shifted several times in the silence, Robin still as a statue. Beastboy pretended to check a watch on his wrist he didn't have, Robin, solid as a stone. Beastboy made breathy noises like a bad beatbox, Robin, silent as death, until finally.

"I need help."

The room became so quiet Superman couldn't even hear a heartbeat in there. Beastboy froze like water at its freezing point, Robin, crossed his legs over, and leaned back with an amused looked at his teammates reaction. He gave a small chuckle and became serious again.

"Over the past few years, you've become almost an entirely new person, you've shifted into a person i don't think you ever knew you wanted to be. I think you're happier than i've ever seen you, with who you are, as a hero, and a person." Robin looked toward the window, avoiding eye contact, Beastboy just stared blankly, completely unsure of where this conversation was going, or how in the world he was supposed to help.

"I don't think i like who i am. I don't like how i think about myself, or how i judge myself. I don't like how some people think of me. I don't think i'm the person i want to be. So my question to you is." He stood and took a few steps over so he was close enough to be looking beastboy in the eyes. Next he did an odd thing, he reached up, and removed his mask, holding it gently in his hands before looking up again.

"How did you become exactly who you wanted to be?" There was a short silence again.

"I mean, i think it's obvious. It's because i grew up, it's because i wanted to be someone, so i became someone. It's because of Raven." Beastboy explained thoughtfully, he never really thought of himself as changing, just- becoming who he wanted.

"I had her to talk to, she supported me and listened, and when i needed it she guided me, and told me thing i needed to hear." Beastboy stepped forward and put a kind hand on his leader's shoulder. "If you don't like who you are, you need to figure out who you want to be, and then you need to figure out how to be that person. What needs to change, what are you willing to do, what are you willing to give up?"

He'd never think Beastboy could be so insightful, but he was making perfect sense. All this time he'd been so envious of Beastboy becoming exactly what he wanted, while he still struggled to figure out who he was. All this time they were butting heads when it was so unnecessary. He was right about one thing though; all this time Robin thought Beastboy's secret to Raven, and he was jealous Starfire wasn't doing the same for him, but... She had been, and he wasn't giving her a chance. Raven was Beast boy's secret, but he was blaming Starfire for where he was failing.

"I think you need someone by your side like Raven is for me. I think Starfire is trying to be by your side, and you're pushing her away. Hell, Star went to Raven in tears because she thought you were in love with Raven."

Robin froze at those words, Star thought he didn't love her anymore? Oh god what had he done. He knew, he knew for months Star was struggling trying to keep up with their relationship because Robin was putting so much strain on it, but he ignored it because he thought there was some easy fix he needed to figure out. "How could i do that to her? I really fucked up." He groaned and tossed his mask to the side, running a hand through his hair, and turning to pace randomly.

"But it's not too late to fix." Beastboy pointed out.

"Do you think Star is my Raven?" Robin asked, his teammates eyes shifted uncomfortably, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and looked away uncomfortably. This was a difficult question to answer.

"I think, Star could be very supportive and loving toward you." He began, "But you're asking if Star could be your Raven, because i still think you're hung up on the idea of Raven and I together, like you and Star."

Robin was confused now, his brow quirked and he crossed his arms while he waited for an explanation. Beastboy sighed softly, and scratched at the back of his neck. A distant clock ticking made apparent to both how much silence was clouding the room, it was starting to become stuffy. Still they remained in there, determined to fix, or at least start fixing this wild mess that had been brewing for years.

"The problem is, you're transition is going to be a lot more complicated than mine, I grew into who i wanted to be as I aged, you're already someone, and you want to be someone new. I don't think loving and supportive is what you need on the front lines of your, 'transition'. It definitely won't hurt. But I think you need someone to ask you the tough questions, tell you things you don't wanna hear, push you around when you wanna give up"

They were quiet again as Robin pondered something, shyly, he looked up at the green adult again. "Would you- uh, be my Raven?" He was unsure of the question, and very unsure of the answer, until he saw Beastboy smirk. "I suppose I could give it a shot." He replied.

He rushed toward the leader, pushing his back until Robin was back in the chair. Beast boy glared down at him. "What about you don't you like?" He asked sternly.

Robin shook off the bewildered look he had from the abrasive action of the changeling, and narrowed his eyes. He honestly didn't know exactly, "My personality? Well, not entirely, my attitude, i guess."

"Attitude toward what? Being a hero? Your team? What?" Beastboy pressed further, raising his voice in hopes Robin would raise his too. He needed to extract answers, he needed Robin to not think, just shout out what came to his mind without over analyzing, or worrying about saying something wrong. "No, just, how i'm viewed by others."

"Like what? How do people view you? As a kid? As a freak?" Beastboy shouted again.

"No, that doesn't bother me." Robin responded, slightly louder.

"Than what? A screw up? A Tyrant?"

"No! None of that."

"Well what? How do you think people view you?" He was screaming at the top of his lungs, Robin didn't respond well. He jumped from the chair pushing Beastboy back as he screamed his response. "AS A SIDEKICK! AS BATMAN'S SIDEKICK!"

They were quiet as Robin took a few deep breaths. There it was, there was the root of his problems, he was the little tid bit he'd been holding on to.

"I still feel like even after all these years without him, people look at me, and go, oh, there's Batman boy, there's the boy wonder." He whispered just loud enough for Beastboy to hear, the latter smirked cruelly. "Of course they do."

Robin glared at him, wondering how in the hell this was helping. "Look at you, you're still dressed as Boy Wonder. You don't want to be his sidekick, but i think you're afraid if you get rid of your costume, your affiliation goes to. So you kept the clothes, kept the name, kept the same attitude and ways of thinking, even if it goes against what you really want. So you can still be like Batman."

He understood now, Robin understood what his teammate was doing. He understood what he was saying to him. "You're right, I can't stand it anymore, I'm not the little kid Batman dogged along, I'm better than that now."

Beastboy reached over and tore off a sleeve of Robin's uniform. The team leader's eyes widened, surprised he do it so suddenly. He kept the bewildered look as he reached at the chest of his shirt with both hands and ripped it clean open. The feeling was incredible, and he couldn't stop himself as he tore piece by piece into the old sidekick duds until he stood in torn rags and his boxers. Both boys were far to pumped to realize what a bizarre situation it was, even if they had, they were both to stubborn to admit it anyway.

Robin was out the door, motioning for the other to follow as well. They fast walked down the hall to the stairs where they met Raven two floors up with a book, Robin motioned for her to follow while a wild grin, she looked confused, and raised an eye at his attire. Beastboy just grabbed her hand, gave her a trusting grin and pulled her along. Eventually she smiled back and was speed walking along with them.

At the entrance of the stairs Cyborg was leaving the restroom, they motioned for him to follow as well. "What in the hell is going on?" He questioned as he struggled to keep up. No one answered. They made a stop at Starfire's door, when she opened it, Robin barely gave her a chance before he grabbed her by the back of the neck, pulled her in quickly and kissed his with all the passion he'd been neglecting to give her for months, just as she started to melt into him he pulled away. "Come with us." He insisted with a smirk, and she just realized his mask was off, something she rarely saw, and his uniform was shredded. She wanted to question everything, but when she saw the confident smiles of her teammates she grinned, took her boyfriends hands and followed along.

They all rushed into Robin's room, he fetched every last costume he had in the closet and drawers and threw them in piles at his team's feet. "We're destroying them."

Everyone looked genuinely confused except the changeling, who seemed to understand more than anyone. "I'm not going to be Robin anymore. The past is behind me, and I'm not longer Batman's sidekick, I need to step up and change into the leader i want to be." He took Star's hand and gave it a squeeze before picking up the first uniform on top of the pile, and tearing it in two and tossing it aside. "I've got your back dude." Beastboy encouraged before morphing into a greyhound, and tearing into a cape with his teeth.

Finally the team seemed to understand what was going on. He wanted their support in his change, and wanted them to help but to rest his old persona, and this was to be there way of Robin The Boy Wonder's funeral. Every picked up a costume, and the destruction began. Bare Hands, teeth, starbolts, plasma cannons, whatever fun way they could think to turn the pile of the past into nothing but shreds. Laughter erupted from all corners of the room, they smiled, and tossed around crumpled up balls of uniform for Cyborg and Star to blast to pieces. Raven fashioned a makeshift skirt from the pieces and tossed it to Cyborg, who took suit and tied it around his waist like a grass skirt.

Beastboy slipped into a uniform and did hulk impressions by turning into a gorilla, before long they were doing Robin impersonations, and laughing at what would soon be the first memory of the new team. Robin stepped back a moment to admire the scene before him, how he'd been missing out on these incredible people because he was in his own self pity. Star stood beside him and took his hand, resting a head on his shoulder as the laughter died down, and the team caught their breath. Finally Cyborg turned to him, all still ignoring him in his boxers, and asked. "So what are we calling you now? If not Robin? Cause believe me when i say, I'm not calling you Dick with a straight face."

Beastboy snickered, Raven rolled her eyes but kept the smile on her face. Starfire didn't really understand, but they'd explain it later.

"I'm thinking NightHawk, Or DarkWing. Something of the sort, I haven't thought it all the way through yet." He replied. The team collectively booed his name choices, he responded by throwing shreds of clothing, and the team followed suit. He didn't know who he was yet, and he wasn't entirely sure how he was going to get there, but he knew he would.


	14. A confession worth 1800 words

Woah its been a while. I'm sorry guys, it's been hectic lately. If you're still reading, i appreciate it. I Hope it was worth the wait!

The next few days had proven to be difficult for everyone. Criminal activity seemed to be at increasing rates. Museums and jewelry stores were practically plundered, Convenience stores torn to shreds, even hardware stores. There was no patterns, no clues as to what was next, and though the team always got there in time to stop anyone from getting hurt, they weren't able to recover all of the stolen inventory. Sometimes the attacks were so frequent the team would split up, into two or three groups. All this going on while Dick still didn't have a new persona, and he had to suffice with a purely black suit and black mask, while his team called him anything from boss, to chief or occasionally still Robin. He was confused and stressed, and the team was tired.

He was mocked endlessly by criminals who guessed easily his change of appearance was no longer wanting to be known as The boy wonder. This of course led to more mockery from villainous type, and a more angry team leader. He tried not to bring his anger on the team, but several times he snapped and Cyborg and Beast Boy, and finally Raven had enough. She let lose a stream of harsh words and profanity about his attitude and actions lately, and just when everyone thought her true purpose was to tear him to shreds, she ended her rant with. "Whatever the hell your name is, you're the best damn team leader were ever gonna get, so stop letting those idiots get in your head." And all seemed okay for a moment, Dick had a small smile of confidence on his face as he silently thanked his team for putting up with him.

They managed to turn their attention back to the group of random criminals who seemed to be hitting up a camping supplies store, and were able to put a stop to it before they were able to get out the door with any heavy merchandise. The team was stumped as to why a camping store would even be on the list of targets to rob, and in the past few days only 1 bank got hit. Exhausted and confused, they returned to their tower in hopes to rest and recover for the night. And for the rest of the night, the alarm didn't sound once. They all slept in the next day, not even Beastboy awoke to train, and before long it was 2pm before Raven was the first to stroll out of her room with a growling stomach.

She began a brunch for the team, every comfort food she could think of and make with the food in the fridge, she would. Starfire came to help, finding great joy in the mashing of potatoes, and stirring of the gravy. The talked calmly and happily to each other, feeling as though the stress had almost diminished from the long sleep. Before long, the boys emerged from their quarters smelling the food, drool dripping from tongues that really should be in their mouths. They found a buffet displayed from all ends of the counters, smells wafting through the air, tummies growling, and warmth resonating between them all.

Dick kissed his girlfriend on the cheek and directed her to the kitchen table while he fixed them both a plate, snagging the bacon before Cy could take it all. Beastboy laid two gently hands on Ravens shoulders, rubbing softly at her muscles, she mewed softly, and leaned her head back into her touch. An action one wouldn't see from two people claiming to be just friends, but the group did their best to ignore it, as the pestering got them nowhere. Suddenly Beastboy smelled something different coming from the pan beneath Raven, he looked over her shoulder to peak. Before he got the chance she turned on her heels with a sweet grace, and presented the mysterious object to him on a plate.

"Tofu links." She smiled so warmly to him it made the food fresh from the skillet seem like ice. He took the plate from her in a daze, unable to register up a thank you as he seemed so struck by her smile. He'd never seen her smile like that before, he'd seen her smile plenty of times, but there was something he couldn't quite place. He steadied the plate in one hand, and laid his forehead against her like they'd done a hundred times before. "Thank you Rae."

She caressed his cheek softly before separating her forehead from his, and fixing herself a plate. The team looked on, but said nothing. The gesture was forgotten within minutes as they seemingly stuffed their face, uninterrupted for the first time in 5 days. The laughed and relaxed together like a family, like they used to do before everything got so crazy. Beastboy tried to start a food fight with Cyborg, who was entirely ready to retaliate. Raven quickly put a stop to that. "You will not be throwing any of the food i made." She roared the order, but she still had a smile on her face.

"Yes, please refrain from the fight of foods, as I myself collared those greens." StarFire chirped in.

"Everything has been delicious, I couldn't eat another bite." Dick stated as he wiped his mouth with a rag, and pat his stomach through his workout shirt. "But Raven and I made desserts." Star pressed again as she flew from the table to bring over an apple pie and a tub of vanilla ice cream.

Beast Boy raised an eye at Raven, "You made an apple pie?" He was bewildered, knowing Raven wasn't hopeless but having no idea she could make a whole apple pie.

"It was a Marie Callender's pie, we had it in the freezer." She admit with a small whine. The team laughed at the protest, and finished the entire pie without a crumb to spare. They all contributed to helping clean up, putting anyway any left over food, putting the dishes in the dishwasher, wiping the counters and table from fallen or lost food. Beast Boy shifted into a small dog, and went after anything on the floor that didn't have meat.

There was a quiet moment they stood in a semicircle, wondering what to do now, should they disperse and go back to their separate rooms. Sensing the hesitation, Garfield nudged Dick next to him, and gave him a look. "So we haven't been interrupted yet, what do you say we try and make this team day?" The leader suggested after seeing Garfield's face. They all agreed, and arranged for what they could in board games, and movies.

Of course Dick wiped the floor at Clue, but as always, pictionary Raven managed to take the cake. Her excitement during the game was incredible, shouting out answers and giving in enough energy for the team. They went through silly challenges, such as trying to hit a paper cup off Cyborgs head with rubber bands, traversing the common room blindfolded, and a new game Dick invented, how would you do it? Where he gave everyone a scenario of a villain and a setting, and a restriction, such as can't use powers, one arm is tied up, its pitch black in the room, etc, and they had to describe how they'd handle the situation. They found it fun, and no one pointed out that he someone managed to slip some form of training into team game day.

They ran out of games, but were too high on energy to sit and watch a movie, so Cyborg turned on the music station on the tv instead. They weren't terribly familiar with current music, being busy saving the city all the time, but the corner of the tv had the artist, song title, year, and album. They knew almost none of the songs, but Dick grabbed Stars hand and danced to some pop song. The group cheered them on with applause and whistles. When the next song started they moved the couch back and Beastboy took Ravens hand.

The music came blasting out of the speakers, something about Nothing holding me back, they weren't sure, but the dancing was slow and skillful, before becoming quick and beautiful. They were in sync with each other effortlessly they were pressed together tightly, and moving as one, than spinning and flying in beat with the music, and its changes. This wasn't just random movement, they learned how to dance. When the music ended, they were panting slightly, the remaining three clapped supportively at the two.

"Where did ya'll learn to do that?" Cyborg shouted as the applause died down. Raven blushed a little when she realized her and Garfield were still incredibly close.

"We took a few dance classes." The changeling admit rubbing the back of his neck. "We're trying to do new things, so we've been taking some classes."

"Some? As in more than one type? What else are you two taking?" Cyborg pressed further as he crossed his arms over his chest.

The two dancers exchanged a look of nervousness, but ultimately Garfield continued to speak. "We took a few cooking classes, we tried a pottery class, a knitting class, a drawing class. Even tried fishing. Dancing and cooking were the only two we really did more than once." To put emphasis on it, he took Raven's hand again and spun her once before dipping her gracefully. She complied and followed suit with his move.

"How long have you been doing that?" Dick asked referring to the multiple classes. They continued to exchange details about the multiple excursions, and sessions that had been going on nearly 6 months. The reason was they were trying to branch out more, get into the community more, ever since the little boy who didn't think Raven had a face. When all the questions were asked, and all the explanations given, they agreed it was time to wind down for a movie. Raven went to change into pajamas, rather than her cloak and leotard. Leaving the rest of the team to build a big bed on the the floor out of pillows and blankets for them all to lay on.

Cyborg and Dick were exchanging glances at each other and motioning to Beast Boy, they didn't know if someone should try asking again, or if it was useless, even Star picked up on the silent conversation between the two and tried to join in. Finally when no one could make out the glances she was trying to give, she caved in and spoke out loud. "Raven is quite a wondrous person, is she not?"

The other two froze, waiting for Garfield's reaction. "Yeah she is." There was a moment of silence as they wondered if something else should be said, but Garfield continued after a few seconds, placing the last pillow on the makeshift pillow headboard as he spoke. "That's why i'm in love with her." Everyone froze.


	15. My Strength My Love

15 chapter. It took me 15 chapters to get to the original story i wrote when this was supposed to be just a one shot. There's still more though. I'm sorry it took me so long, i've got a lot going on. I actually only came back to this because i got a message from someone reminding me i hadn't update in a while, asking if i was going to continue. I feel so bad that it takes me so long. But i really hope you enjoy this. ALSO* I had written a majority of the flash back a long ass time ago, as the one shot. Most of the flashback is copy and pasted, with some minor changes to fit the plot i developed. No it's not lazy, it's exactly what i wanted the flash back to be. Anyway, please let me know if you like it, i really could use some encouragement. Thank you everyone who comes back to this story despite such long periods of nothing. It means a lot to me. You guys are MY strength. Too cheesy? Alright just read the damn story.

The remaining team members stared wide eyed at the green shape shifter, not expecting the word love at all. Certainly they'd all suspected some romantic feelings, but fathomed nothing more than a crush. "You- you love her?" Dick asked with a strange tone of voice, shocked but also… hurt? Starfire ignored it, promptly keeping her attention on Beastboy, who nodded in response to Dick's question. He had this attitude of obviousness about him, as if this should be no shock to the rest of his team.

"I knew it man, i knew it!" Cyborg exclaimed, throwing his hands up in exasperation, doing a turn while he contemplated something. "Hold up man, i asked you once if you had a thing for her, you completely denied it."

The green one pondered this for a moment, confusion hidden in his knit eyebrows as he tried to recall this conversation. "I don't remember that at all."

"We were playing video games, i asked you, and you're exact response was-" the robotic titan switched his tone of voice to try his best Beastboy impression, hoping to chapter his higher pitched tone "Are you being serious? Like are you crazy?" He repeated the line to a T, as if it was copy and pasted in from a previous chapter of their life. The realization came to Garfield's eyes as he understood what his best friend was referring to.

"Oooh, I wasn't denying it, i honestly thought it was some kind of a joke, i mean i thought i'd been pretty obvious about my feelings for Raven. I mean if you hadn't gotten it by then, i thought you must ben either joking, or blind."

Cyborg looked for a moment like he wanted to kill him, all the coded messages, and denying them being together and him wanting confirmation made him look 'blind'? Before he could say the slightly cruel words in his head that would need a censor in their younger days, Starfire stepped in to defuse. "Have you ever thought about telling her?" A look of hope in her eyes, and confusion in Beastboys.

"I already have, a long time ago." Their wide eyed expressions informed him they needed more back story, so he sprawled himself on the nearest seat on the couch, and got comfortable to tell the story. "Like a year ago? Maybe more, back before the whole patrol in the forest. We'd been better friends for months. And I had known it for weeks before i told her."

-She wasn't expecting it, would have truly never seen it coming, and it left her wide eyed and on the verge of losing control of her emotions. It wasn't that she was unhappy, in fact she was pleasantly surprised. However, she couldn't handle this type of thing, it sent her so close to the edge that a picture frame of the wall cracked and shattered. Raven stood, half turned away but facing her Teammate who was literally on her knees in front of her, a look of pure determination in his eyes as her reaction to his words had barely phased him.

Go back further? Like another 5 minutes? Okay

She was on her way to her room, it was midday, and she felt like grabbing a book to read while the others watched a movie. Beastboy had followed her and stopped her in the hall. She aaused and turned to him with the same monotone face she always wore, but her eyes were kind. He looked nervous and rubbed the back of his neck.

"I uh, I had something to tell you, but it's a little weird." He sheepishly stated, barely able to make eye contacting. Raven cocked her head to the side, making her curiosity more apparent. When they did finally make eye contact there was this electric feel that sent shivers down Raven's spine. He had this feriosity and seriousness the empath had never seen before, and she felt so many emotions she didn't know could be felt all at once by a single person.

She urged him to go on, and he took one of her hands, surprising her further. "You are my strength Raven." His voice was cracking from nerves, but still sounded strong and deep. Her eyes widened at that moment, and her mind with racing with possibilities of what could be going on. After all this time, he'd never stop trying to make her laugh or smile with his jokes, so this was an act or something? He'd read one of the books she recommended and this was a scene from it, and he was proving he read it? He saw it in a movie, or one of his comic books?

Without really thinking she cracked a smile and turned away with a chuckle. "Good one Gar, come on before we miss the movie." A joke was her only explanation. She froze again when he dropped to his knees, she couldn't fully turn back, literally petrified in place. This was where they were now. Her wide eyes half turned. Picture frame cracking.

"I'm serious Rae, I love you."

Her heart was literally exploding in her chest, she sensed no hint of lies of mockery coming from him, and it terrified her more. He was being completely honest. Sure she'd always felt love from him, but she assumed that was just how he was, always happy, always loving, always fighting. Her emotions were at war as she processed his words in his head.

"I know you can't feel the same way back, or can't show it. But I do, I fell in love with you so long ago, and everything I do, i do for you. You make me so strong Raven." The way he said he name so softly so full of passion, she felt overwhelmed in the best way, her heart was flying, stomach turning, but she didn't let it show.

Beastboy didn't let her fear stop his confession though. "I don't want you to pretend to love me back, and i don't want you to feel bad for me. I've come to terms long ago that we could never be, and if we could, it would never be normal. What I wanted was to let you know, because I want to get to know you more Rae, I want to be closer to you. I want to spend every day showing you how incredible you are, I feel so incredible just when I see you smile."

He let out a laugh of disbelief finally realizing the impact of what he was saying to her, and how insane he must sound. She had collected herself better, no longer looking terrified. "You really do make me feel stronger, you make me feel like i can do anything. I want to be by your side, I want to be your comfort, and your rock. I want to improve myself because when I'm around you I feel like I can do anything. Please don't ever feel like you're hurting me because you can't or don't feel the same way. I'm so thankful to you for making me feel the way I do."

Beastboy swallowed hard and took a deep breath, he took her hand one more time, looking up from his kneeling position shifting slightly on his numbing knees, their eyes locked beautifully, the neon green and royal purple. "I don't want you to be with me, or tell me you love me too, I want you to be my strength."

They stayed in the position for a few silent moments, pondering what to make of the exchange. The longer the pause went on, the more nervous the changeling became. The air between them was thick, but he was positive that no matter what she said to him his love wouldn't falter. It could hurt like hell and tear him down, but the way he felt was absolute. Her mind was racing back and forth, and she tried to calm her emotions before speaking.

Everything that was just said to her, it was the most incredible thing she'd ever heard, and for the first time in forever she was upset with herself and how her emotions worked. More than anything in the world she wanted to be able to embrace him and kiss him and tell him she loved him too, she wished she could feel normal. This man in front of her just gave her his heart, and she had to think of what to say to not shatter it.

The silence finally ended when Raven kneeled beside him, took his other hand so both were embraced, he looked at her with such hope that she had no doubt what she was saying was the right thing. "I'd be honored to stand by your side and be your strength." She whispered it carefully, hearing a couple light bulbs shatter in the hall. The dim light shifted the shadows on his face, and she couldn't help but see how handsome he was. He probably had a similar thought, before he even realized what he was doing, the words spewed out of his mouth "You're so beautiful."

Another lightbulb and the floor actually shifted under them, she smiled and stood, aware that she needed some space to mediate or the tower may come crashing down. "I think I need to go collect myself." She explained releasing his hands. Her mind was blank, and she had no control as she reached over and kissed his cheek lightly. Beastboy was shocked and stared wide eyed in return as she retreated toward her room.-

That was it, that was the confession, that was such a huge part of the bond, that was the first time he'd told her, and so far the only; if you don't count the interruption in the forest when he almost said it again. The others looked shocked at his story recollection, having a suddenly new found understanding. Being Raven, dealing with what she dealt with, her large lack of emotions, and also closing off the few she did have. Beast Boy didn't have a chance.

And yet, he was so dedicated to her, so protective and loving and kind. It suddenly explained a lot of past interactions, a lot of actions and words that made no sense for the relationship they claimed to have. He was in love with Raven, and she could never feel the same way back. It wasn't like it was her fault, even Garfield acknowledged it could never happen.

Everyone had their own internal feelings going on, their own thoughts. Starfire was filled with sadness, fully understanding the extent of a relationship that could never be, the pain of loving someone so deeply you couldn't have. She had old memories of her and Dick in their younger years, she turned to him, eyes filled with a strong appreciation. At the same time, Dick felt so much jealousy and anger melt away. All the conflict he had about this bond the two had, all the threat he felt from them having a stronger alliance than to the rest of the team; to the team leader! It was gone- gone with a cloud filled poof of familiarity. His care for Starfire was far deeper than the rest of the team, more than he'd admit aloud. He can only imagine how it must feel for Garfield to have the feelings he had, and know they could never be returned.

Meanwhile, Cyborg just stared with a tight lip, on one hand, he could never imagine what the feeling would be like, having never really been in that deep of love. On the other hand, even just picturing it was hurting him. How was beast boy so strong? So brave to be in this situation everyday?

He saw their faces, knew what it meant, knew they were casting him pity. "Guys it's okay. I'm okay." And he was, mostly. "I knew what i was getting into, i knew what it all meant, and what could never happen. I knew before i said anything to her. I'm not waiting for anything to change. I'm happy just being by her side, being in her presence. She really is my strength."

They were silent, trying to think of something to say. Before they could, Raven returned to the room, Black PJ shorts and a baggy dark blue hoodie, with the hood drawn up. Her smile fell as the multiple feelings in the room hit her. She felt despair, pity, confusion, and … love? She looked to Garfield, he was smiling at her brightly. "What did i miss?" She asked slowly, shifting her gaze to each person in the room.

"Nothing Rae, just a story, i can tell you later if you remind me." He knew she wouldn't press the issue unless it came up again. He'd absolutely tell her, didn't mean he wanted to though. They took seats and popped in a movie. Raven and beastboy sat together, leaning against the couch on the giant pillow bed on the floor, The didn't cuddle, or lean heads on shoulders, they didn't spoon, or sit in each others laps. They were just friends… Unless of course you're sitting where Cyborg was, and could see her hand laid gently over his.


	16. Not all good things last forever

3 days had passed, and Beastboy was right, Raven didn't press asking about the story that seemed to have everyone so sullen. He was pretty sure she figured out on her own though, as she was careful around him the next few days. He didn't bring it up though, or point it out, they'd have the conversation before, multiple times, and he didn't really want to have it again.

On the fourth day, things seemed to be getting back to normal. Cy had tried sitting down to talk to him, and he was compliant, until Dick came in to ask for some help, to which the shapeshifter eagerly jumped from his chair, and raced out of the room. In the command room, Robin sat down, scatters of paper and wads on the floor and desk, around the trash bins, even one paper airplane lodged in the bookshelf. Upon closer inspection, they were costume designs, name ideas, new possible weapons. Everything needed for a complete super hero makeover.

"I'm uh, having trouble putting this all together." He rubbed the back of his neck, and handed his green teammember a stack of papers, his final decisions. Gar flipped through them, making faces once in a while, he stopped a few times to take a second look, but was basically lost and indecisive. "I'm as lost as you, I never changed my name or uniform" He handed them back, and took the spare chair in front of the desk.

All the costumes were too flashy, the names too cheesy, and he didn't even understand what half of the weapons were, he was trying to cram too many things in at once, and it was becoming weighted down. They brainstormed for a while, Dick explaining a lot of things to him, like the high tec equipment and weapons. Garfield mocked a few things here and there, but praised what he liked. Finally they had crossed out all the names, narrowed down the costume choices, and had a finalized list of weaponry that Dick was skilled in and had access to.

"Why is the name so difficult?" The team leader shouted, yanking on his hair in frustration.

"The first name you had wasn't terrible." Gar contributed spinning absently in the swivel chair.

Dick stopped for a second, giving him a raised eyebrow. "JusticeFeather?" He gave a look of disbelief, his lips drawn into a line, a basic bitch face apparent. Gar scrunched his face, and shook his head. "No, when we first tore up the uniforms, what was it? Night- something, Darknight? No, Nightwing? Yay, i liked that one."

"No, i never said Nightwing, i said… Wait, Nightwing." He rolled the name around on his tongue. "Nightwing?" He questioned. "Night-wing." He stated more matter of factly. "Nightwing." He stated once more with a menacing tone of voice. He smiled, and jumped up excitedly, exclaiming that they finally found it, the name was perfect, now he just needed to build around it.

He pulled out the costumes again, immediately scrapping anything that was too brightly colored. One of the things Dick was eager to have with his new persona was bringing about more of his acrobatic ability he had learned before his parents- when he was in the circus. He of course would rely as well on some technology, but he didn't want it weighing him down. One of the things he hated most about his Robin costume was the bright colors that gave him absolutely no chance staying in the shadows. When they foiled nighttime bank robbers or criminals the reflecting moonlight made him stick out like a giant incoming target. So the two decided the suit would be mostly black, no cape, form fitting to help him move. They played with the idea of a dark blue bird across his chest, and spitballed about having boot compartments.

By the time they seemed to have the rough draft down, they were both letting out yawns. Dick excused the two, excited to share his progress with Star, and make some calls about getting started on the suit. Beastboy wanted to crawl into bed and get a good night's sleep before training tomorrow. Before he could make it to his room though, he bumped into Raven, not so much bumped, as she was waiting for him.

She looked at the floor, biting her lip, nearly drawing blood, when she did look up, her eyes were filled with his downward expression of pain and anguish. Dread was dripping from her in the form of an invisible cloud. "We should talk." her voice was drawn out, not cold, but maybe a little resistant and frightened. Gar knew she was forcing herself to stand ground and say this, and that frightened him a little. He gave a simple nod and followed her.

The next few days were extraordinarily tense, no one knew why, Garfield seemed to just be in a sour mood, and Raven seemed distant and unsure of anything she said. He spent most everyday all day in the training room, alone. Intensely training on weights, angrily destroying the obstacle course, when Starfire passed by with a bottle of water, she saw him punch the heavy bag directly off the chain and to the floor, he followed behind it, strandling it and punching repeatedly. As if the bag had just insulted him in the most cruel way, and he was finally getting revenge. This wasn't training, he was taking out his anger on it.

Slightly afraid and more than a little alarmed, the alien left the fresh water bottle by the old one, and retreated quickly, trying to be absolutely silent and unseen. She had succeeded, for the most part, Gar had finally stood and turned just in time to see the long ends of her hair and legs disappear with haste out of the training room. He spotted the water bottle and took no more than a few seconds to take the entire thing down, rubbing down his forehead from the various droplets of sweat.

Raven meditated alone in her room, only occasionally slipping out to eat or get tea, and once down to the shore just to walk and watch the waves. Robin contemplated if someone should go down to check on her, but by the time he looked out the window again, she was gone. The two somehow naturally avoided each other, never intentionally leaving a room when the other arrived, but already on the way out when the door would open. Cyborg couldn't be sure if it was just pure coincidence, or if they just knew each other well enough to guess when the other would arrive.

The tower was tense, three fifths of its inhabitants frightened, and the everyone confused on what to do next. This went on for the better portion of a week, with multiple crime fights going south and the entire base a battle ground. Finally the newly dubbed Nightwing decided he needed to take action. He was the team leader and he needed to get his team back on track, he needed to get to the bottom of this. Already he knew talking to Raven would be a near impossible task, so he turned to Garfield first, calling him down to his office, asking him for his opinion on his new uniform.

Garfield entered the room, responding to Dick's call, only to find the room empty. He took a step further in, and from the corner of the room, in his new uniform, Nightwing emerged. Black slimming suit, large blue bird streaking across his chest, simple black mask hiding the upper half of his face, he even had his dark hair shaggy and grown out. Seeing the figure step from the shadows so gracefully actually frightened the changeling for a moment. When he recognized his team leader he actually let out a relieved smile.

"You scared me for a minute, the uniform looks great!" It was honestly the first Garfield had anything other than a scowl on his face in days. Nightwing stepped around to his side of the desk, muttering an honest thanks to him, feeling good in his suit.

"I know you know why i really called you down."

Garfield sighed heavily and sat as well. " I do now." he crossed his arms over his chest, and sat up straight and puffed his chest a little. Despite still being more muscular than Dick, the black outfit was intimidating. "Look, we can say i'm checking in on you as team leader, but honestly I'm worried about you two. Even before you two got along, it was never this bad." He took a moment to remove his mask so Garfield could see the emotion in his face. "I don't want anything to happen to my family."

He softened at that, seeing his normally stoic leader look a little heartbroken shook him a little. He uncrossed and slouched in the chair a little, unsure of exactly where to start. The recollection hurt, the talk he had with Raven was painful, she didn't mean it so, but she couldn't help it. "She told me we needed to talk." Garfield began with a hesitance in his voice. Dick leaned in closer, sensing the length and severity this story would be.


	17. There's pain in the truth

Wow, you guys have been so supportive and kind, it makes me so happy. I didn't know this many people really liked what i was writing. Seriously that makes me feel incredible, thank you guys so much for all the love and interest. That being said, this next chapter is going to sting. I'm sorry in advance, but i promise, eventually… it will get better.

He followed her, reluctantly, but hot on her tail, a smile though forced curved his lips. She didn't smile, didn't even attempt, there was fear and sadness seeping out of her, but Beastboy remained calm and pleasant. That's what he had to do, it's what he always did for her. He pushed down everything he was feeling so it wouldn't overwhelm her, so it wouldn't offset her own emotions. He figured it was easier than having her prying into all his own pain. So he choked it down.

She didn't feel his immense despair whenever the thought of his parents came to mind, or his hopelessness whenever he looked and saw the beauty that could never be his. Raven didn't feel the anger he felt as the beast clawed at his insides, nor the malice of the monster inside. He pushed down on his inappropriate thoughts every time he caught sight of her long shapely legs, or he got close too her and smelled her shampoo, ignoring the urge to get closer to her.

Worst of all, he suppressed most of the love he felt for her. He'd never bury all of it, but he pushed it so far down she barely scratched the surface. It was his greatest sacrifice to her, pretending that he wasn't so deeply drowning in her, in how much he longed for her, cared for her, needed her, just her. Everything was her; how she liked her tea, what she dreamed at night, the prayers she'd never admit to anyone else that she says late at night when she feels lost. He thought of her kindness, and her sweet face when she took a sip of fresh tea, or how relieved she was sometimes to unhook her cape, and slip into a big sweatshirt.

He'd memorized everything about her, how her teeth aligned, the shade of violet in her eyes, and how it compared to her hair. He knew the spots on her shoulders and back she liked massaged and when. Knew which book to fetch her when she wanted a quiet morning in. He knew which body wash she liked, even though it was expensive, but she loved it because the smell was fresh and made her think of peace. He knew her every wish, hope and dream, he loved her so much, and she'd never know.

Beastboy planned to keep it that way, if she knew just how much emotion he had for her, she'd never be able to control her own turmoil. He'd been practicing keep his emotions hidden for years, and by now it was just normal behavior, only letting himself go when she was miles away. He'd even gotten good at detecting her emotions, he was no empath, but he was an expert on Raven, and he learned all her subtle facial features and quirks, what her body language meant, her breathing, her blinking, her hands, her posture, her, her ,her.

So he could see the pain in her eyes, and her eyebrows drawn in exhaustion, he could see the stiff way she walked, she was uncomfortable, and her hands were under her cloak, but he knew they were in fists, which meant she was stressed. Beastboy knew what every detail meant, and he knew what everything together meant. They'd had this conversation before, but he had no idea why she felt it necessary to have again.

They were on the roof, and he wasn't sure if it was a coincidence or cruel irony. She had tears in her eyes, and his smile fell, she'd never done that before. Raven looked over the water and gathered herself for a moment. The tears were gone a moment later, and her stoic face was back.

"Garfield, we are never going to be together." Wow

Wow…

He looked at her for a moment, waiting, hoping for her to say something else. Sure he knew that she'd said it before, he knew that a relationship couldn't happen for them, but why would she bring it up so suddenly and so blunt. When the silence confirmed that was the end of her sentence he let out a deep breath in a hiss between tight lips. He put his hands a top his head in a stretch and pondered his words… poorly.

"What the fuck Raven?" It didn't come out as harshly as the words sounded, but it wasn't a kind tone either. She flinched slightly.

"Don't be surprised, you knew this already-"

He cut her off the second she finished the word, "Yeah. know, you bring it up enough." his tone was harsh and eyes narrowed. "But why the hell would you bring it up like this? What even brought this conversation on again?" He took a couple steps around for a few moments avoiding eye contact.

The sun in the distance was a good excuse not to look him in the face, so Raven looked toward the ground, her cloak encasing her entire body hidden so he wouldn't see her shaking, and for once he didn't notice everything about her. He was so busy being angry, he didn't pay attention to the way her face wavered or her hands shook.

For several seconds there was silence, until she spoke. "I don't want you to forget. I don't want you to ever get your hopes up." Was her stoney response. "I can not love you. And there will never be a way for me to love you." She was being blatantly cold at this point.

His mouth would have dropped had he not been so frozen and numb. "Everyday I see you, I feel it coming from you, I feel love from you, growing some everyday." It was growing because there was too much to hide. "Love I will never return."

By now he recognized the emotions growing in him, being amplified by the beast. This conversation needed to end soon, or he might lose control. "Great well thanks for the reminder Rae." He turned to leave as smoothly as he could, but she grabbed his shoulder. Images flashed in his mind, and they weren't his. Pictures of destruction, and pain, anger and anguish. Destroyed buildings and ruined property, bodies and blood. He didn't know if she knew this image was shared, but it didn't appear she had any idea what she just showed him. For a moment he forgot he was angry at her when he was reminded of the horror she had in her mind everyday, but as soon as her cold angry eyes were directly in front of him, he felt the anger again. She didn't.

"You're furious. You're heart broken. I know how pissed off and close to losing control you are." She was in his face, sternly raising her voice, but not yet yelling.

"Well yeah, kinda hard not to be." He pulled from her grip and walked toward the edge to see the water, hoping it would calm him. "I can't feel any of it from you. You're hiding it from me."

The sun was setting now, and the scene would be beautifully romantic were it not for the heartache surrounding the air. For a moment he broke, he let all the anger go, let it all emanate from him, and she was thrown into its swells. Her own mind clouded, feeling fury and evil taking over, her eyes flashed between red and violet a few times, and she gripped her head as a migraine overtook her.

Garfield took a deep breath and regained control, pulling back everything. He masked his pain, his anger, he pushed the beast down. He buried everything he felt. Love included. Soon the emotions left Raven and she found herself empty, the pain from the hollow was almost as bad as the migrain. So long she'd felt him nearly every second of the day, without everything was just blankness she hadn't felt in so long.

"You can't handle everything I feel Raven. So maybe it's just best we just pretend neither one of us can feel anything." He knew the retort was immature, but he was still foggy with rage and the beast was howling in his brain, making his ears ring. He pushed passed her, leaving her alone in the cold bitter void.

-Beast boy found himself brooding in the chair in Dick's office, said leader sitting in front of him. Even he failed to remain wooden as his heart ached for his teammate, for both of them. He could never imagine what they were going through, and just trying to hurt like hell. He wished so desperately for something to say that would help, but it seemed he fell short of any sentence to aid his companion.

"Look we'll be fine, we both just need some time to gather and collect. I don't know how long it'll take, but eventually we'll come back to each other. I know Raven and I can't be together, she literally can not love me. And I know why she said what she said. Doesn't make it hurt any less, but there wasn't anything she said that wasn't honest." The green man had a soft smile on his face, almost sympathetic if you looked at it the right way.

"Eventually we'll gain control of the situation, and we can go back to how it was before." He stood from his chair, heading toward the door as he spoke, feeling the need to be out of this stuffy room, and tense aura. "We're both mature; her more than me, adults. We can fix this, you guys don't need to worry about us." And he was out the door before Dick could talk, unable to hear the pity from his team leader. Dick was left alone in deep thought, relieved that his love and relationship for Starfire would never be so complicated, but it also left him wondering why he never noticed just how much the changeling had grown up.


	18. I'm at the surface

Being 100% honest, i did not grammar check this. Its late, i have work early, and i spent all day rereading previous chapters to make sure nothing gets contradicted. i know i probably shouldn't upload if its not completely ready, I just know that if i don't get this up, it's going to be a while before i have the free time to do it. So if the grammar gets bad, lemme know, and i can fix stuff at another time. Thanks everyone for your continued support to me. As soon as i can i'll get working on the next chapter, it shouldn't be as difficult because i know what's going to happen.

For the next few days, the atmosphere of the tower was bizarre to say the least. Beastboy was still on guard, and while he smiled and acted normal, it was obviously fake. The gleam in his eyes just wasn't there anymore, and the effortless grin that left his face soft, was now rough, and stretched over tense skin. His body was stiff, and he didn't look anyone directly in the eye.

As for Raven, she kept her hood up at almost all times. Everyone once in a while Beastboy would gently tug it down, and give her a trying smile, but they both knew it wasn't real. She'd sit in silence most days, conversational contribution was minimal. It was almost as if she was reverting back to her old self, when she was introverted and though everyone found her creepy. But now instead of creepy, she thought everyone found her heartless and cold.

The team tried to remain out of it, but did their best to encourage Raven to join them, to keep her out of her room. Raven and Beastboy didn't meditate together, or read together, but Starfire once accidentally came across them in the kitchen, sitting in utter silence. She wasn't sure if they just got done talking or were just about to start, but they were strained, with grim faces, avoiding each other's gaze. Beastboy was leaning against the counter, his eyes to the floor, and Raven in one of the chairs, hood up, body covered, eyes to her hands in her lap.

Raven skipped the next movie night, and Beastboy barely paid any attention. Crime fighting was kept professional, He still stuck closely to her, protecting her, and watching for her. They just weren't as in sync as they normally were. There was one criminal, the last one of the gang robbing a hardware store. Beastboy was tired and a little aggravated, and he didn't even bother morphing into an animal, just waited for the guy to get close enough, and punch him cold in the face. The criminal went down, blood coming from his nose as he groaned on the ground.

He turned and walked away, shaking his hand lightly, everyone looked at him a little oddly, he didn't normally react in such a way. "Beast is acting up." He muttered to Robin as he walked away from the rest of the group. His eyebrows were slanted with anger, and his chin and mouth were drawn in a deep frown. No one said anything to him, Raven just turned away, and avoided his gaze. "We should talk." He stated as he passed her, and for once Raven was on the other end.

Once back at the tower, Beastboy made his way to the training room first, going crazy on anything that could take his strength, the punching bag, the padded walls, he punched a metal sheet until he was sure his hand was about to break. When the stinging of his hand caught up to his brain, he sat himself on a bench and took a deep breath. "Get back in there." his eyes were screwed shut as tight as he could make them go. His shoulders tight and flexed, fists balled as he mumbled to himself, or the beast rather.

The beast had been scratching at him for days now, feeling anger and pain from his talk with Raven, feeling anxious from his lack of fighting anything worth while. He also hadn't been meditating lately, and not having Raven around has made it harder to keep in control. For days he'd been trying to quell the scratching coming from his inner walls. He hadn't felt the beast this bad since the forest with Raven.

As if on cue, she slowly made her way up behind him, putting a soothing hand on his shoulder. Startled at first, but he allowed the contact, and took another deep breath. Compressing all his feelings so she wouldn't feel them. Raven wasn't sure why that bothered her so much, was it the emptiness she felt without his emotions? Or was it the idea that she knew he could do that, and had been doing that, and all this time she thought she knew exactly how he was feeling, but she actually had no idea.

This is what any non-empath felt all the time, so why did it bother her so much, this is what it felt to be like everyone else. Putting aside her own turmoil, she sat beside him on the bench but kept a decent distance. "You wanted to talk?" Her voice was soft, timid almost, and it made beastboy feel kinda bad for this entire situation. He didn't like making her feel like this, but it wasn't directly what he did to her, she was also feeling bad about what she said to him.

He buried his head in his hands, and rubbing his face in a massage type gesture before moving to his head and neck. "Yeah, but i'm not really all that calm yet, so we can talk tomorrow."

She wanted to interject, but had no idea what to say, she didn't have impartial wise beyond her years wisdom to give him. She simply nodded in response, and watched as he stood from the bench and left the training room. The sight of the weightroom was more alarming then when she originally came in, now that she was actually taking the time to look around. One of the punching bags was on the ground looking tattered and beaten, a few boards were broken and splintered, a metal sheet by the weight rack was dented in slightly. Her heart beat in agony as she considered the pain he was in.

Beastboy made his way to the shower to clean up before he would retreat to his room for the night. Once in the shower he turned the water up as high as it would go, and let go of every emotion he felt, he didn't hide anything. Had Raven been near him, she'd probably overload on everything he was releasing. His muscles tensed and curled under the steam, stretched and cranking every joint and muscle he had. Rolling his shoulders and neck, flexing to release all the built up tension. The beast soothed slightly, feeling the heat calming him, and his muscles relaxing.

A low growl from under his breath, as he felt everything melt away. His skin was darkening under the scorching temperature, but he didn't notice, he was numb to it. The steam filled the entire bathroom, and he stay in for far longer than he needed, just standing and releasing everything. He washed his hair with a dog shampoo, and scrubbed down with bar soap. He shook to dry off and grabbed a towel to finish the job. His plan was to spend the rest of the night in his room meditating, and confronting Raven tomorrow.

When back in his room, he changed into some pj shorts, and a white t-shirt. He sat himself on his bed, and put on some soothing music. There he sat for the rest of the night, meditating to the music, and collecting his thoughts. He reorganized his entire brain of all the cluttered mess from the last few days. At some point he may of fallen asleep in his cross legged position, but it didn't feel like he did, he just knew he closed his eyes in the late of night, and what seemed like a few minutes later he was opening them to the sunshine of morning. Everything in his body felt refreshed and ready, like he had a few days prior.

He was sitting in one of the many halls of the tower, it wasn't outside Raven's room, but she did walk this hall when going to the kitchen or common rooms. So he waited for her there. Only a few minutes passed when she rounded a corner and spotted him, sitting on the floor, back and head against the wall, looking almost at peace. Out of the side of his vision, he spotted her, and gave a gentle almost apologetic smile. "We should talk Rae."


End file.
